I dont recognise me anymore...

At 68 coming on 69, i dont recognise me nor my life anymore, where did i go, where did it go…Where is my Richard, well wherever he is he is in a better place now than i will ever be…I have become a mental wreck, a very lonely and frightened person…I have no one to love, no one to love me…I once had a life, Richard once had a life…I am here, he is there wherever there may be, and i am not there with him, nor is he here with me, not his fault, believe me he would never have left me, so loyal, so reliable, so devoted, such a unique and special partner to me of 20 years…


1 Like

I know how you feel,Jackie.I was Robs carer for 14 years and now I only have me and the cats to care for.Every day is the same and I think,is this It until it’s my turn?Every day when I wake up,I plan on going out but I sit in the armchair and before I know it,it’s lunchtime.I can’t make the effort.I lost Rob 10 weeks ago and it might as well be yesterday.I don’t have a life without him.We should have had a lot more years ahead of us.He was only 60. x

I am the same Jill, it’s like groundhog Day :disappointed_relieved:sit in front of TV till it’s dark again. I made the effort and went into Town today but met 3 different people who didn’t know I had lost Colin so had to tell them. Then a lady I know quite well did a detour to avoid me. I don’t blame her as people don’t know what to say do they :frowning: It was walking through a gents department that killed me seeing things that he would have suited and knowing that I won’t ever be buying him anything again, it just breaks my heart. Like you we should have had so many more years together, so bitter that our story has ended in such a way :sob:
V xx

Dear MrsColt,
I do feel for you, I wish that something could be done for each and everyone of us but that something is impossible to achieve. I am convinced that we do meet our loved ones again, I have so many on the other side. I suppose, as my GP said, when someone grows old losing people of our generation is to be expected.
It is a terrible shock when our loved ones are no longer with us, people avoiding me was common when my dad died, in a way not being able to walk far has it’s compensations as being allergic to solar light and the sun has.
Take care,

One of my neighbours totally avoids me when I come out of the front door and I don’t know why.The last time she spoke to me must have been 6 months ago.Her husband always speaks to me though.It was hurtful at the beginning but then I realised that she has a problem,not me!

1 Like

Very wise, Jill. x