I lost my Dad, suddenly and traumatically last year. At first the support was overwhelming. Now, almost a year down the line I feel alone and isolated. I dont know if its me isolating myself. It often feels like I’m living in a bubble, and everyone outside of the bubble is just continuing with their lives. I watch them and wish that I could be strong, and happy, like them, without this constant heavy weight. I wonder if people are getting sick of hearing about it, or if they think that I’m just ok now. Some days it feels too much. It’ll be a year on April 20th since I last saw Dad alive. My heart still hurts, I still cry, I still miss him, and I still can’t believe that he isn’t coming back. Sometimes it feels like I’m losing my mind.
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Sorry for your loss. I feel the same. My Dad passed 30 years ago this month and my Mum passed on the 3rd Jan this year. I feel everyone is carrying on with the life and I am in limbo. I never really came to terms with Dads passing having been a daddies girl I didnt want to accept I would never see him again. Now Mum as well has highlighted all the last 30 years and now I wont see either of them again its unbearable. The loss of anyone close is hard, but when a parent goes its as if you have to grow up all of a sudden and you dont have that link to your childhood anymore. I am 63 this year so already grown up but still had that child in me until now I feel I have lost it.
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Hi SharonS1 and Lynnbug
Your words resonant either me so much. I lost my mum 2 yrs ago and my childhood home has been sold. No other relatives in the town where I was brought up and I live 35 miles away. Just feel lonely with everything gone in so many ways. It’s so hard.
I just try to keep busy, set myself targets for each day and week and also plan monthly treats like a night away, cinema etc. I have a wonderful husband but grief makes you feel very alone especially as I am retired now so getting motivated to go anything can be very difficult
Sending love to you both.x
Deborah
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Hi Deborah
Sorry for your loss. Luckily my brother still lives in the family home as Mum wanted. I’m sure a time will come when he will need to move and that will be very hard for all of us - it’s the only home his has known, plus he cared for Mum with me being a distance away.
It doesn’t get any easier does it. I feel lonely in my grief and know I will for a long time.
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Thank you both for sharing your feelings. I’m very sorry for your struggles and pain. I’m lucky that I still have my Mam, as well as my Grandma, some aunts & uncles, and cousin. I left my daughters Dad 2 years ago, shes 12 and they don’t have a bond. I think being a single Mam makes things hard for me too, I put so much pressure on myself to get being a parent right, and often feel like I’m failing. My previous relationship has left me with aniety and other mental health problems, so even though I have people around me I feel like I isolate myself from them, even though I often feel lonely. I just think people have their own lives and they can do without my misery all the time 
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I’m so sorry for the loss of your dad. It’s good that you had great support initially and maybe you could reach out to the people who were there for you early on.
I lost my dad just over a month ago. I started to go back into the office after the funeral and sometimes it’s overwhelming. The distraction is good in some ways. But I feel like everything has changed and I’m just expected to carry on as normal. Very few people outside my immediate family are still checking in.
Sending a hug in solidarity.
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It will get better just of the good times you had