I lost my partner last month.
She was my world.
She had cancer in 2016 and wwnt on to have 2 more cancers.
She past away 22/11/2023.
I carnt bring my self to talk about it.
So im hoping that writing about it will help.
I have stayed at work to keep busy.
Being the cheerful person i always have been.
But inside im dying.
When im at home on my own every night i try not to thinking about it.
But i just start crying.
Im the one who has always said don’t cry because it doesn’t help.
Now i find i carnt control my body from crying.
I try to quickly snap my self out it but it just comes out.
Im getting on with my life and i am coping with all the day to day things.
But its just those lonely nights when im not at work l
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@Pauly im so sorry for your loss. I lost my partner on the 5th november to cancer too everything happened so quickly and its like he is still in the hospital. I admire you for going back to work to keep you busy. I am off work until after Christmas but in one respect i wish i just went back as being at home all im doing is thinking about Dave. I think crying does help as it is a release of your emotions because i believe trying to bottle them up is not good for your health.
I think the loneliness is the worst and getting on with those day to day things is hard.
I get so angry with what im going through and i have found this site really helpful to know that you are not alone and others can relate to how you are feeling.
I just hope things get easier 
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Hi @Pauly. So sorry to hear about your loss. I lost my husband on 25 October only 10 weeks after being diagnosed with cancer. I keep waking up expecting him to be next to me. Like you I went back to work as the support of my colleagues is such a help. Although I do struggle with concentration. Have you seen your GP? I have anti depressants which really help. Although bizarrely they stop me from crying. I know I will have to cry at some point but the pills are good are moment.
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Im so sorry for your loss.
My work colleagues are more like family than friends.
Over the past 7 years of her going through cancer they were very supportive and still are more than ever.
I try to focus on my step dauter and grandson while not at work and try to bring so.e joy into their lives.
As all we have done for 7 years was spent alot of time at hospital.
Which i would of been more than happy to do for the next 50 years if she had been here.
I hope we all can in someway cope with our loss.
They say time is a great healer.
But does that mean we have to not think about them to stop the pain.
After having them in your life for so long and then nothing .
We new this day would come and you try to prepare yourself.
But it is nothing like i thought.
I will cope with it i said.
How wrong was i.
I am so sorry for your loss .
Hi, i lost my wife unexpectedly December 13th. I have never experienced anything like this, I’m normally a strong person, but I am really struggling, can’t eat sleep or motivate myself. I like you have a very supportive work team that I have been with for past 16 years, called in to break the ice before Christmas and the lads were just as broken as me! I know going back to work will keep me busy, but just can’t face it! Horrible and at same time reassuring that others feel the same, feel for all!
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Hi im sorry for your loss.
Being at works takes my mind of it and i try to get some normality back in my life .
My partner passed in October and still find my self breaking into to tears.
I dont now how long this will go on for.
But i do now one thing .
I do owe it to that little boy i used to be to give him the best life possible.
So i will keep going taking it one day at a time and try to make my life better for me my step daughter and grandson.
You must do the same for you.
Your not alone .
I couldn’t and still carnt talk about it.
But writing on here helps and i can do that.
So you talk to me as much as you want.
Im here for you my friend.
You are not alone.
Thanks for the reply, really helps to know I’m not completely alone, although certainly feels like it, but not been 3 weeks yet. So hopefully in time??
Thats all we can do my friend.
Hope it gets easier in time.
You take care and remember im here if you want to talk .
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