I had to watch my son take his last breath

We had to turn off our son’s life support off on 1 April 2022 he was only 12 years old. It’s all my fault I agreed for him to have hip surgery, a week later he became seriously unwell with sepsis. He fought hard for 6 weeks in ICU but sadly pancreatitis took his life. I will never forgive myself I miss him terribly & feel like I will never be happy again without him.

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Hi Annie. Sorry for your loss. It is a truly awful thing you are experiencing.
I had to take the decision to switch my son’s life support off, different circumstances, but same heartbreaking decision. It’s such early days for you, you won’t know if you are coming or going, if you keep posting messages on this sight you will find like minded people who Will do you no harm, we are all here for the same reason. You will have terrible feelings of guilt, but it genuinely was not your fault, you were not to no, you made the best decision at the time as regards your son’s hip operation. As I have found through experience and also reading people’s messages. The guilt comes as standard. You will see really quickly, we all suffer from guilt, it’s a parent thing, I know you will feel you are to blame more than most, but believe me we all feel exactly the same,. Your world we be completely upside down and will carry on doing so for quite some time,. There are no rules, if you need to cry all day, scream, shout, stay in bed, drink, get sleeping pills from the docs,. It’s a familiar pattern that we have all done. Once you can begin to see straight you will find that aslong as you keep interacting on this site you will gain strength and help. Check the thread ,lost my son at 27,. Just join in you will soon find yourself talking to some Wonderful people who are or who have been where you are,. Take care my friend.


Hi Annie im sorry for the loss of your son .its heartbreaking .you have come to the right place like jim said always someone to talk to . Nothing will make sense your in shock .baby steps theres no rules god bless you take care xxx zoe xxx

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Oh Annie I am so sorry for your loss it’s such a tragedy I lost my 22-year-old son in October of 2021. I also had to let him go it’s heartbreaking and I blamed myself for lots of things and felt guilty. In the beginning I was saying to myself what if I or if I hadn’t done that, but it is no way your fault and as time goes on you will be able to know that. Sending hugs to you :heart:

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Hi thank you for taking time to read and reply to my message I really appreciate it. I am so sorry for the loss of your son too, life is so cruel at times. Do you have other children too? Thank you for your comforting words, does every day just feel like ‘groundhog day’………

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Hi Annie such early days its such a trauma .give your self time .just do you . Everyone grieves different .baby steps sending you love x


Thank you so much Jim for your comforting words of support and good advice. I am so sorry to hear of your terrible loss too. Take care too

So sorry for your terrible loss too & thank you for your message. Sending hugs too