I have lost everything over the last year or so

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I have lost my marriage, my husband, my job, my health, my children (because they can’t interact with me), my income, my self-confidence, my home, my dog, my “stuff” (that my husband threw away when I had to move to a hostel after he physically assaulted me), and my quality of life. I know what I need to exist, and it isn’t a lot, but I can’t seem to attain it. A small home with my dog, where I can get to shops so I can buy food) and not have to be subjected to the hate from so many people around me. I want calm, and safety…

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I should mention that all of this started with the loss of my Mum a few years ago - my sole supporter, probably soul-mate, and partner in crime. Since she died I have been sinking year by year to the point now where I have no interest in living anymore

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Hello @Lasselante,

I’m part of the Online Community team and I can see that you are new to the community - I’d like to thank you for bravely starting this thread and sharing how you are feeling. I’m so sorry to hear about your mum. Most community members have sadly experienced the death of a loved one and so will understand some of what you are going through.

It sounds like you’re looking for support and I’m glad that you’ve been able to share how you’re feeling with us. It is very normal for people who are grieving to feel a bit lost and not know where to start.

We know that a lot of people experience suicidal thoughts when they are grieving, and it is often about wanting the person who has died back or life to go back to how we know it. We have a video about it here which you might find helpful:

https://griefguide.sueryder.org/support/suicide

There is lots of other support out there, and I would really encourage you to reach out and speak to someone about how you are feeling.

  • If these thoughts of suicide become overwhelming, please call 999 or contact your GP for an emergency appointment immediately.

  • You can call 111 and choose the mental health option to speak to a trained mental health professional (England, Scotland and Wales only)

  • Samaritans are available 24/7 to talk about anything that you are worried about in confidence. You can call them on 116 123.

  • Shout are contactable by text, 24/7. You can text REMEDY to 85258 and talk to them about anything.

  • You can also find your local NHS urgent mental health helpline.

  • Sue Ryder offers an online bereavement counselling service. This is a free service and sessions are held via video chat so you can attend from home. There’s more information about this service here: sueryder.org/counselling.

You can also make an appointment with your GP and ask to be referred to counselling or other support services in your area.

You can also look at: Losing a parent - coping with the death of a parent | Sue Ryder

You deserve care and support so please, @Lasselante, get in touch with one of these services.

Take care,
Alex

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I really have reached out to every available resource, but I’m still alone

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i am very sorry for your situation. i also lost most everything - my dad, then my job, then my aunt, then my mother. i sold the house. traveled. then i lost two good friends. it has been hard. five years later, i am much better but a ways to go. my mother was my best friend as was my dad. i also lost my ex-boyfriend. he drifted off. i since wrote two books, one is published, got some more money and the will to see about dating. a friend who is 80! just married her boyfriend, 80. there can be life ahead. i stuck it out. no siblings. many times i wanted to join my mom and dad. but i hang on. takes time but hang on. things most likely will turn around. i also got involved teaching adult ed and write for a magazine and now secy of the local astronomy club and belong to a singles group at the church. but it all took a lot of time and counseling. counseling helped me A LOT. :grinning:

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Berit, your reply has given me hope. I, too, enjoy writing xx

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