Hello everyone. My husband of 52 years died suddenly today. I am lost and don’t know what to do.i love him just as much as ever and he was my reason to live and we were so happy. How do you carry on living when you only live for one person who is suddenly taken away. He was my reason to live and I am ashamed of myself for not being able to cope. Does it ever get possible to have a normal life again. Does it become possible to lead a happy life again. Thanks for reading my rambling message. Carol
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@Carol21 dear Carol I am so deeply sorry for the loss of your husbend and that you are going through this heartbreak. Your head and emotions will be all over the place right now. Please don’t be ashamed of yourself for not being able to cope, as that it something we all feel. I lost my partner in April 2021 and she was my reason for living. We have 3 pets so I keep going for them and her because she would want me to. As your husbend would want you to as well. It’s a hard journey we are on now. But you are not alone and this community is very caring and supportive. I hope you have support around you. Take one day at a time and even a minute at a time. You are probably also in shock right now. As for a normal life, I don’t know. Its a different life, not the one we chose, but the one we are now on. May I also suggest posting in the losing a partner,spouse, category as you will get responses from people who are going through the same loss as us. My heartfelt condolences go out to you. When you are ready sue ryder offer bereavement counselling as do cruse. You could also talk to your doctor. You will get support here. Again I’m so sorry you are on this journey. You are in my thoughts. I’m often around if you want to talk . Take care sending hugs x
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Dear Casey.
Thank you so much for your reply. It has given me some hope that I can carry on. We were together for 50 years and now they seem to have ended so quickly.
Your reply is so thoughtful and has given me some hope that I can get through this. Thank you for the offer of talking at some point. It is good to hear from others who know how I feel. Very best wishes Carol
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@Carol21 hello Carol you are very welcome. I have found so much support on this forum and have made some very good friends. It really does help to talk to people who get it and understand what we are going through. I do know that it feels like you are alone, but you are not, we are here for you and we all try to help and support eachother as best as we can. You can say whatever you feel here. You take care love and hugs casey x
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Dear Carol, I am so sorry for your loss of your beloved… How could you possibly be able to cope… How raw the pain is… Do come on here where others will understand the feelings that are now part of each day… X
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Dear Beetango many thanks for your lovely reply. I am just so very sad at losing my beloved husband after more than 50 years together. I feel like half of me has gone and I love him so much. I do appreciate you taking the time to write to me. Love from Carol
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My dear Carol, i see you and hear you.
I lost my husband of fifty years to cancer… For me, as you say, the better half is gone and those lovely qualities that enriched me and encouraged me are lost… Is this how you feel… ? People say think of the lovely memories and yet all I can see are those last weeks… This is a lovely site to share and know that others think of you and send a hug and wish your pain away… love x
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Dear Beetango, thank you for the message. I was just sitting here on my own crying but your message arrived and you describe the feelings perfectly. I can’t stop thinking of my wonderful husband and what I have lost. You understand perfectly. I don’t know how I will go without him after all the wonderful years we had together. I am so grateful to you for caring. With love Carol
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Dear Carol,
I am crying with you…
The better our marriage, the more we have lost…
At the moment, our bodies just wake up in the morning… Try to eat a little and although we cannot concentrate for more than a minute try to read anything… A quick sleep in the afternoon as nightime is harrowing…
We are with you here… not enough but sending care… love.x
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Hello again and thanks for caring. I am just sitting here thinking of Geoff and I am crying. I don’t know to go on without him
Take care
Carol
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Dear Carol,
Geoff is a lovely man… I think, and a joy to know… Don’t try to work anything out… it is too hard…
Big hug… love… x
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Thanks again. You always cheer me up
Love
Carol
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Hello Everyone
Just sitting here and thinking of Geoff as usual and thinking of all of you in similar situation. My thoughts are with you. It is not getting any easier for me and I am still lost. Just wanted to say thank you all again and I am thinking of you.
Love from Carol
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Dear Carol,
I hear you: so another purposeless day has gone by; each day with thoughts of our beloved and the void that is the foreseeable future… It is a comfort to relate to fellow travellers on this lovely site… We wish they had no need to be here…
We wake up in the mornings and programme ourselves to do chores, but the joy has gone. It is thirteen months for me since Gordon passed and I feel just as lost as I felt in the beginning…
I have had major surgery twelve weeks ago and it has been so hard to go through this without my partner here to talk to and be encouraged by… I have definitely wanted to give up…
I send hugs to all the lovely people who support and offer their stories…
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Hello Carole,I have just read your message from a few weeks ago.Do you still feel the same or just managing to cope.
I lost my partner in January this year and I finding a lot of things very difficult but not quite as overwhelming as in the first few weeks.
I really feel for you and all the people here,some people say time heals but we don’t have a cut in our hand to put a little cream and plaster on.That will heal in its own time,so should a broken bone.Our grief is raw and many people wish we had died first.
We struggle for a reason to live without the person we loved the most and who loved us unconditionally…but the thing that keeps me here and makes me cope when I would rather give in is the fact that we had 39years of loving and I couldn’t bear the thought of throwing it all away…
I hope you are doing a bit better but if not please turn to those who truly understand.xx
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Hello Pushkin
Thank you so much for your message I do appreciate it. I am still the same really. I cope for a little time and then just seeing the chair he used to sit on brings the tears back. I just really miss him and I love him so much. It does help getting messages like yours because you completely understand how I feel. I am lost really and stuck in the pain of loss.
Love from Carol
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Hello Carol,
Unfortunately we are in the same position.I’m just the same about Malcolm’s chair and I picture him sitting there quietly reading his newspaper.
Your so right I do completely understand and to quote you. “I am really lost and stuck in the pain of loss”.It’s despair really.
There are some people I wish I could meet face to face where we don’t have to pretend to be alright.
I am thinking of you Carol and I do wish with all my heart that things will improve for you,me and everyone i on here who carries this awful burden.x