I lost my husband, Ian, aged 53 on the 12th October suddenly with a ruptured aorta. We were lying on the bed, he shot up, looked at me and fell in my lap. He was gone 
We have been together since we were 16, married for 26 years. He was my soulmate. We did everything together and now my world is full of darkness since he left me.
It was his funeral yesterday and it was a heartbreaking but beautiful day. I honestly don’t know how I can live my future without him. It was always us together against the world
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Penny, so sorry for your loss, i can relate to your feelings and situation as i lost my wife 8 days ago, the feelings of loss cut so deep, the silence, and the loss of the one person you actually need to speak too. Your friend, your rock, your literal other half.
Im trying to get my act together and organise myself but each time i start, i lose motivation.
I think that im going to try and find a support group of similar people to talk to, may this could work fo you?
Happy to chat further, or not. I wish you well on your own journey
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So sorry for your loss Murphy. Eight days is very early stages bless you. Trying to grieve and organise the funeral and all the paperwork is so so hard. Trying to keep busy is best but like you say, you have no motivation at all. I miss Ian every second of every day. We thought we had years left together and many plans for our future. Yes, I have looked at community groups, and have lots of good friends and family who have been my rocks.
I miss my wife Fiona more than i can bear, and like you say, it the loss of all the things we were going to do, the dreams the memories we had planned on making.
I am trying not to sound like some sad lonely bloke when i reach out to people but what do you do when you just need to talk to someone at random times, times when you would have spoken to your loved one. The times where just a hug is all thats needed.
Its so hard to do this, family are ok to a point but they dont truly understand the feelings you are going through.
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Murphy nobody understands how you feel, your relationship with your wife was unique and your grief is also, if you are living in the same house where you lived with your wife it is a massive reminder of what is missing, Joan died 10 months ago and I have removed most of her things from the house, I opened a drawer yesterday and found a bottle of open perfume, the sadness I felt was awful.
I have no advice to offer you only that you must carry on putting one foot in front of the other and drop any macho man act and accept any help offered, the worst thing that could happen to you has happened and you are extremely fragile.
Things do get slightly better, thinking back on my first months I can see things have improved but missing Joan is,I’m afraid, lifelong.
Try to seek advice on any financial problems you may have, it may provide a distraction for you, I would think that some help may be available if you have a child in the house.
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I can really resonate with you, my husband who was only 50, died 4 weeks ago today, the cause is still unknown, he died in he’s sleep while I was abroad with work.
We also were together since teens, married 35 years, it really is devastating, I can understand your pain 
I really pray the hurt gets easier to bare 
Today hasn’t been the easiest, fiona was cremated today, so feeling particularly low. Someone compared grief to the ocean or waves, so it either gently washes over your feet or it can hit you like a tsunami. There also the weather that accompanys it. Currently im standing on the beach (in my mind) and there a full on storm all around me, and the waves are huge and crashing on to the shore, the ones that explode with a massive deep noise. But i also know deep down that that i just need to do this so i can get through it. The waves keep coming but sometimes their smaller and its not always windy and raining. Maybe one day i can find comfort being rocked gently by a nice calm swell.
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Im sorry for your loss i lost my wife 6 months ago to lung cancer her lun ruptured and sh died at home i tried to resuscitate her but i couldn’t. We wer married for 26 years and i cared for her for the last two months of her life. I had to leave the home we shared and loved as it was to much. I now live in a flat on my own its so hard and I cry everyday
Thats tough going mate, wish i could say something that would take the pain away. Time, they say, i know it sucks but i hoping its true.
Try to find something that motivates you, start small and keep at it, small steps. We will get there.
I hope so mate its so hard i know how you feel when you mentioned the waves its a horrible feeling that suddenly hits you. Christmas is also coming and i don’t feel like celebrating this year