I really don;t like being called ‘lovely’ it is so condescending, and in reality and you have started arguing ‘the odds’ haven’t you. .You should frame it as your experience and left it at that, But it is lovely for you that you can gain comfort and that is why religion itself which is different from belief in a grand designer, was invented - both as a comfort for human beings and for others to control human beings. It might be more plausible if you actually bothered to siten to Christopher Hitehcnes arguments on God on You Tube. He died in 2011 from cancer, a most eloquent and good man if misguided on Iraq. A lot of media watchers were hoping he would have a death bed conversion. He did not succumb. I have had experiences which could be interpreted as spiritual but many would put down to serendipity. I do not know is the answer.
I meant to type this out without literals but I honestly think I am developing a late onset dyslexia. One of the errors should have been ‘listen’ in ‘bothered to listen’
My apologies for calling you lovely, my intention was never to be condescending but kind. And honestly perhaps I should have just said it was my experience or maybe I shouldn’t have bothered to reply at all. It’s in the moment of reading your message I wanted to reach out and try to help if only to acknowledge what you and all of us are going through. I personally don’t have time to get into arguments and point scoring against people. I have enough to do just getting through the impossible grief that every day brings me
Hello everyone,
This thread has become a little heated, and I would ask you all to please remember that the primary purpose of this community is support.
We know everyone is going through a very difficult time, and emotions can run high. Our community guidelines ask that members be sensitive to each other. It’s fine to disagree as long as it’s done respectfully. Please do bear our guidelines in mind when posting.
Thank you,
Seaneen
You are not alone in grief . I am grieving from my husbands terrible death on August 5th this year. The way he died without support from the services who were supposed to give him sedation, was inexcusable. So I think of his pain and suffering too every day. I had a recussitation dream last night. I am disabled. that is why I wrote what I did to Yorkie. If someone says they don’t know about God, leave them be is my answer. I aaaccept now now you meant to be kind not to preach that there is a God. I tried to explain that one minute I was talking to a lightbulb of all things crazy to do, as if he was there and the next seeking rational explanations with Christopher Hitchens . Lovely is what some people call people in Cornwall which is a local thing which is fine but my name is Rosie. x
Its ok I didn’t come here for an argument as I’ve already stated. Everything I said came from a place of kindness and empathy. However I will now leave the group as this has all upset me too much. Thank you.
My apologies for anyone I’ve upset but as I said I will respectfully leave the group now
Please do not leave the group. You have done nothing wrong. I find this group a really good support and come back time and again to not feel alone in this hard journey 
I second that, please reconsider your decision. We can find solace in speaking and listening here quietly or actively. We are a tapestry of loss, and our different and complimentary hues and colours’ of experience bring an richness of insights and support
Michelle, you are a Yorkshire lass, I was married to a Yorkshire lass for 50 years. So you can call me lovely any time you want:grin:
. So please stay.
Hi Yorkie247, It is now 137 weeks and 2 days since I lost my beautiful girl. I’ll never recover from the loss of the most precious person to ever inhabit my life. She was and still is my everything, my world. I cry every day, I can’t remember the last time I had more than 3 hours uninterrupted sleep. I wake up in a state of anxiety as the reality of another empty day without her sinks in. I’ll never be the same person again. The loss of my wife, partner, best friend and forever love has broken me. The feeling of complete emptiness, loneliness and sadness never leaves me alone. I’m totally lost without her.
My husband passed unexpectedly. I found him in his tool she’d. I can’t escape seeing him like that. I was under investigation for poisoning him. Yesterday the police dropped the investigation. That whole ordeal caused me to be severely impacted. I’m am very slowly becoming the person I was before David passed. I have began to build courage to fight against the anxiety and panic. It’s one step at a time. I’m starting to finish things he started and will start things he had planned. David loved my creativity, and clumsiness. He said he had to protect me because I was so naive and innocent. I am sorry, didn’t mean to go on about me. I’m still grieve, feel guilty when I did have a good day, but I don’t want to loose myself in grief. I am saying to try to be what she loved in you. I have to remind myself often to be Mary not my deceased husband’s wife and my day does become better.
Thank you all so much. I don’t know quite what to say. I joined a gym back in May, and it’s been helping more than I expected, but I still have some rough days that seem to come at random. I’m trying to trust the process — I know it’ll take time, but I’m getting there.
So alone,
I am so sorry that you have had to suffer so much trauma on top of the shock of your husband’s death. I can’t imagine how awful that must have been. I just wanted to tell you that the replaying of you finding your David in the tool shed will fade. You are right - it is one step at a time and initially for me the final moments of my adored husband’s life played over and over again in my head. It doesn’t any more. I can bring it to the front of my mind if I choose, it can occasionally flash in but it doesn’t dominate my every waking thought. Take care and just plod forward. It isn’t easy but the only healer is time.
PLease don’t leave the group Michelle, most people on here do find some comfort. It makes you realise that so many people are grieving in their own way. Sometimes I come on here and I feel more upset after reading the posts but overall I’m glad I joined.
Hello
I am so sorry for your loss. I know too well that feeling of silence and darkness. I have four cars that provide comfort but nothing will replace the loss of my mother who had pulmonary fibrosis. A terminal disease that there is no cure. On the day she died a wonder cure for this disease was launched in the US but it will take about two years before it will be launched in Eurooe. Do know that you are not alone as everybody on here in this wonderful website is suffering as well. Do reach out if you want to. I am suffering extreme loneliness especially now during Christmas. Take care and God bless.
I realized that I can’t possibly have any messages or signs from my deceased husband until I let go of the pain, anger, and my feelings that I didn’t want to live anymore. There was nothing positive coming from me. Things really changed when I realized that David was not in pain. He was in a peaceful state. Then I decided I was crying over my losses : I was lonely, suddenly I found myself being overwhelmed with doing the things that David did . There’s so much . I accepted it and began to think of what I should do. I tried hard to not dwell on what I lost instead I began to think about what David and I had spent our lives together achieving and those things we had planned. I decided I would continue to live the life we were building. Yes, I would have my tearful moments, I still do. When I was no longer consumed with the negative energy, I began to receive signs from David. Some happen when I am trying to make a decision about something. I get signs when I begin to feel overwhelmed. I sometimes get signs when I ask for one. My husband passed 09/14/2025 and the first 2 months were full of terrible events. It took over two months for me to start letting all the negative energy go. I still have challenges but I feel David’s energy and I am able to do it one day at a time.
@SoAlone
You are absolutely right. The Dr Moody books indicate that we are put on the Earth to be creative. If I can just lift my mood enough to achieve something then I can feel the energy rush.
I think our departed loved ones are with us all the time we just need to develop our sixth sense to see the signs. I’m sure boosting our energy levels enables that sixth sense.
Thank you for your post.
Your post was really inspirational. Thank you
I really like Dr. Moody. He’s a character in the best sense of the word. I had his original book in the 80’s as a nurse and like his website.