I only ever had one grandad growing up but he died when I was seven or eight ad was never close to my dads side of the family, the only grandparent I had was my mums mum, my gran. She died in january 2026 at springhill hospice, never got to say one last goodbye to her as she went in her sleep. She was my favourite person in the whole world, the one who fully believed that I could do anything. Life is hard as of recent as i’m 15 and i’m sitting my GCSE exams in a few months and it’ll be the first major thing that I can’t tell her about. I’m struggling to sleep, for example instead of sleeping i’m trying this bereavement app thing out. I’m always crying at night or when i’m on my own as It’d be wrong for me to cry in public and infront of my family as there going through pretty much the same thing. I just don’t know what to do because ik that my life will never be as good as it was when I was with my Gran. She was the one person who could make me genuinley smile.
She wouldn’t want you to be upset she would have understood as being her age she must of lost relatives herself and wouldnt want you to have the pain forever. It’s very hard but you must live on as she would want. If u feel like u want to cry just cry let it out.
It’s seems as though the fact you didn’t say goodbye plays on your mind. Don’t let it it’s not a goodbye it can’t be she will be around you in some kind of way.and she will have the memories of you as you do her forever.
I lost my nan and I miss r conversations and her presence. Nans are so caring and wise. I never thought she would pass as she was such a higher being in my eyes.
Keep busy try walking or journaling. If your struggling to sleep try to think happy thoughts before you go to sleep or escape to a reality world till you fall asleep.
sorry to dump more grief here, but I just feel like texting it and reading it back in my head helps alot tbh. She was the one person sho actually understood me as a person, I have autism and my Dad doesn’t really care and my mum thinks it means i’m incapable of being independant. She also was the only person to see me as an equal. My parents will always favour my older brother as he’s the eldest and most succsessful atm and will always give my youngest brother all of there attention aa for my 2nd youngest beother he also has autism but because he is alot more violent with it gets everything he wants when he musbehaves as hi is ‘misuerstood’. My gran was the one person who saw me as an equal and honestly listened. I still have my parents and my brothers but none of them will properly listen or understand the way my Gran did.
No you get ur feelings out I totally understand. I have adhd and I to process this has been arwful. It consumes all thoughts. My nan always listened and saw me as the best thing ever and cared so much. I feel lost.
I’m sure your nan wouldn’t want you hurting and to try and move past this arwful thing.
Have you explained this to your mum and dad maybe they Havernt fully saw it from your perspective. Sometimes they may not even thought of it like that.
Maybe try journaling and writing all your feelings down.or is there any support or someone to talk 2 at school?.