I’m mourning someone I didn’t know after a tragic accident

Coping with bereavement
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My sons friend died in the car my son was driving. I’m coping worse than anyone, even the other mother is comforting me. I’m mourning the loss of a young life, I worry about my son and I cry for the other mother. The family are very supportive, it was a tragic accident. Has anyone any experience of this. I don’t know what to do. I don’t fit a box of a bereaved person yet I cry every day and am struggling.

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Hi
I’m sorry to hear what happened to your son’s friend.
I dont think its surprising at all how you are feeling. You arent feeling bereaved for yourself but for your son, his friend and his mother. You probably feel bad that you still have your son while his mother doesn’t and you are feeling awful about the whole thing.
Recently a colleague of mine died suddenly very young. I feel so bad for his daughters, baby grandson and his partner. I’m also so sad for him. He was just months away from retiring and going off to enjoy his life.
On top of this I’m mourning my mum terribly still after 8 months, not just for me but for my daughter, and my mums siblings.
Things will get better but it will take time.
Cheryl x

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Thank you. I do feel terrible even though I’m elated that my son is still here. There’s so many mixed emotions and I’m finding it hard. Also the shock of the phone call. I’m sensitive and feel for everyone. Thanks for your kind words. I hope you find comfort as time moves on as well. X

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Thankyou Ganne x

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Ganne sounds like you have a wonderful empathic nature. Which can also be a little upsetting in times like this.

My best friend was in a car crash and her mum
Died whilst she was driving. I however was the one who developed a fear of driving. I wasn’t even in the car. I just felt so sad and heartbroken for her. And just couldn’t get in a car. She got back in her car a few months later.

Look up the word Empath. Once you put a name to it it’s easier to deal with and understand why you feel the way you do.

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Jooles
How awful for your friend x

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Hi I don’t need to look it up. I’m definitely an empath. It’s a burden I find.