I thought I was doing so well, seven months into my grief. But now it seems to have started all over again. Almost unbearable.
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Hello @Bonnie3,
I’m so sorry that things feel almost unbearable right now. Grief can come in waves, and it’s very understandable to feel overwhelmed again even after feeling you were managing a little better.
I’m just giving your thread a gentle “bump” for you - hopefully others will be along to share some support.
Take care,
Harriet
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Thank you so much, Harriet.
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Hi Bonnie, I have just gone through a week which was like one of the first weeks. The feeling of utter despair, pain and crying all day. I hope these moments are just through backs, realisation that our reality is now something very different to what we were expecting.
Wishing you all the best
Tom
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Hi Bonnie,
So sorry to hear you have been having a tough time. I’ve spent many years working in healthcare, and I have been fortunate enough not to lose anyone close to me in my 61 years. I have been very grateful for this. I recently lost my beautiful dad, and spent many times in tears away from sight in the weeks preceding his death. When dad died I felt unnerved by grief as I had no idea how it would play out for me. None of us do I guess. I initially felt the numbness that people speak of , and I felt slightly unnerved at what was to come. I still do. We’re into our third month now since we lost dad, and yesterday I had the lowest day ever. My motivation was so low, I was lost, lonely and so desperately sad. I just didn’t know what to do with myself. In contrast today has been so so different.
My point is that it seems like grief is a bit of an unknown quantity - it has no rhyme or reason to it. There is no order to feelings, it just takes you by surprise sometimes when you least expect it. Be kind to yourself Bonnie and remember you are not alone. Know that you will move through it in your own time. I don’t believe it has a definitive end, but I do hope that time will help. Take care.
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I’m the same Bonnie. I’m 7 months along and I’m feeling like I’m back to the beginning of this nightmare. I have no motivation to do anything. I go through the motions in my job which I now hate. When I got in the door this evening I just collapsed in tears and despair.
I can’t believe this has happened to us, to our lovely life. Ray was the kindest man and we adored each other.
I don’t know where to go from here.
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Hi Bonnie 3
They are right it is in waves it comes along when you least expect it and there it is grief all over again mine has been like that it the most horrible thing we have to go through i our lives
Last week I was out and my car got bumped by the driver.behind we went into the m&s car park and there was no damage to my car but how it hit me I wanted to ring paul and he would have come straight up got out of his car and came over and gave me a hug and told me things would be alright but I did not have him and that made it worse than what it was so you see it hits all of us and we think we are doing ok then its like a brick wall just keep talking on here it helps someone will come along and give you advice and help when needed
Sweetlady
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Yes, it’s the lack of someone you love being there to hug and reassure you when things are uncertain. It’s total solitude, isolation. X
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Hi bonnie3
Yes you are so right i did miss him so much last week and nobody gets or understands it 
I suppose that is normal they never will until they are in our situation its a bloody lonely place to be in
My anxiety has kicked in today and its making me dizzy and this is all because of one person 
not happy at all at the moment .
Sweetlady
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