I thought I was doing ok

I lost my dad to covid, almost 3 months ago. I am completely devastated and heart broken, however In recent weeks I have felt some what ok. I don’t know if I am trying to protect myself from having a break down.

I’ve been working from home for a solid 6 months, and am supposed to now start going in the office once a week, starting tomorrow.

This has completely unnerved me. Earlier, I burst into tears and had a panic attack. I don’t know where it came from.

I’m not sure if I’m worrying about having to face people I haven’t seen and what they’re going to say to me. I am dreading going in and getting upset and having a melt down at work. Is it too soon?

Dear RavenRose,
Is it too soon? I think that only you can answer that question. From posts I have read on here, there is no set length of time before people feel ready to go back to work. It is very personal and depends on lots of factors. You know your office environment, what the atmosphere used to be like, how many people are going to be there, how much interaction there will be. How did you get on with the others before? Are they aware of your bereavement? Do you think they will be supportive? Have you thought about how you would answer any questions if asked? Is there a private space you could withdraw to if things became too much and you needed a bit of time on your own? I hope that by thinking about possible situations and how you would feel about it will help you to make a decision about whether to give it a go tomorrow or ask for some more time.

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Dear Raven Rose,

Three months ago today I lost dad. As I have said in another post I am not coping well with the loss and the responsibility I now feel for mum is weighing heavily on me. She is so desperately sad and low. However going back to work for me has been a good thing. I work in a school and seeing the children and my colleagues, following a daily routine does give me some element of normality and security. The first couple of days I was anxious but it got easier. Only you know if you are ready. There are times now I feel I am not ready but I think work helps me