I had a day today where I almost felt pre loss happiness. My friend “bullied” me into going to a flower arranging workshop. Something I would never have done before I lost my husband.
It was wonderful, walking around, picking the flowers (all indigenous and no lilies whose smell triggers me after all the bouquets I got when my husband died) The flowers were beautiful, the sun even shone, and when arranging the flowers I had to concentrate to arrange them. I could not believe how beautiful my flowers looked! The lady running the workshop did the flowers for my husbands funeral and she chatted to me about that and I could answer her without crying. Then when I got home my dear friend messaged and said to come to her house for tea. She said I seemed like a different person.
So for those of you who are in a bad place, I wanted to share that I have had some awful days recently and now I have had a really good day. I thought of my husband but without the usual despair, I even discussed doing the Christmas workshop so I could make him a wreath and because he loved arts and craft, I know he would have loved one that I made.
Tomorrow could be your “flower workshop day” xx
What a lovely, uplifting post!
Thank you.
Thank you. I thought I would share my day to show that not all days have to be bad. I am 3 months into this new life and I just know my husband would have wanted me to enjoy the rest of my life, so I am trying my hardest to do that🤞
Yes good days are unexpected.
Like I looked out and the bonus of all that rain was that my runner beans loved it.
I got a handful and cut them up and will cook them today
And these plants I grew from seed had loved it and blossomed all round so cheerful. Some of my tomatoes had ripened.
My son cleaned out the blocked drain and luckily someone promised to clear out my gutters.
Well if they turn up.
Last time not hence my blocked drain.
That’s lovely; there are good days, and we should enjoy them when they come, as so much else is bad.
I can remember my first “good day” after my husband died. It was about a month later. My eldest daughter had taken me to a family event in our beautiful local park. My granddaughter was sat watching Punch and Judy with her friends, my daughter and I had a whippy ice cream each with a flake, the sun was shining and we had taken a lovely picnic and I was smiling. Then suddenly I felt awful, how could I be happy when I had lost my husband of 40 years.I wanted to cry, I wanted to scream, and then I realised that I owe it to him and his memory to live my best life. He would be so cross with me if I didn’t (as I would have been if I had gone) So now I embrace the good days and live through them for both of us, I tell him about them when I visit his grave, and I always will x
I am really pleased to hear about that good day. Yesterday was a mixture. My son was here and hadn’t seen him for a fortnight. The good but was I made us both a nice meal with broccoli, peas, carrots, Yorkshire pudding, roast potatoes and I had two sausages and he had a minted burger with thick gravy. Using my air fryer, steamer and microwave it didn’t take so long. We both enjoyed it together in the dining room table.
We both live alone so it was good to make a meal for two. He helped me watch A Very Royal Scandal by sorting it out for me on our packages on TV. So I learnt something. He helped me sort if some admin which was tough but so relieved. I actually got through to the helpline at Gov.UK.
Had to wait over 20 minutes and pay £3.50 for the telephone call. But for once there was a great young guy who knew the answer immediately. The bad side was that both my son and I got crazy stressed trying to find the right info in the first place. But it was a sense of relief after several goes at it.
Kept saying that dad/deceased hubby would have done it; would be proud of us. My father was good at it and tenacious as well. I don’t know if I always believe the Bible verse that says: can do all things through Christ who strengths. But if it is a crutch to help well can feel grateful.
Enorac, getting any sort of paperwork done is a good day, and that lunch sounds lovely! We are all on this journey that we didn’t choose and I am determined not to crumble.
On the D-Day commemoration in June, my husband and I were watching it when Tom Jones sang “I won’t crumble if you fall” I was getting very emotional watching it and then my dear departed husband announced he wouldn’t crumble if I fell, he would sell the house, cash in the on our pensions and travel the world 
That was 3 weeks before he died. I have to say I have no plans to do the same but that song now gives me goosebumps and when I hear it I quietly promise him that I won’t crumble
I might have thought of being adventurous 20 years ago. Good today it isn’t wet and I got in the garden and picked some dead flowers and started putting it in the bag ready for next Thursday’s bin collection if I am around. Wondering whether to go with my son to Blackpool as he has to go for a work conference.
Thought of going and buying myself some chrysanthemums down the village.
I ought to get out for a walk really. The sun pops in and out.