Hi everyone Iām new here today 
Iām a 48 year old woman and I found out a few months ago that my Husband of 30 years is Terminal 
He had a double lung transplant 3 years ago and has been fighting rejection ever since 
but now the Consultantās say my Husband has Chronic Rejection which there is NO Medicine or Treatment for and heās now Terminal
Iām completely Devastated I canāt see anyway forward without him, heās ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING to me
I feel like my life is now over, weāve been together so long I donāt know anything else I really donāt want to go on without him
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Hi so sorry youāre here Iām also quite new to the forum. I like you am also 48 and I lost my husband almost 3 weeks ago. He had a cardiac arrest after just returning home from having a quadruple heart by pass. He sadly suffered a brain injury despite me giving him CPR. Itās been such a traumatic time as it first we didnāt know the extent of his brain injury and whether he would survive. When I was given the news that he wouldnāt I couldnāt accept it or imagine being able to live without him. I just didnāt want to contemplate a life without my soul mate. Iām still really struggling now but just taking everything one day at a time. I canāt look to far into the future itās too painful. We have 3 children and my youngest are only 11 and 12 and they need their mum and Iām trying to help and support them as best I can. What I can say is I feel very slightly better than I was I was first told he wouldnāt survive. When he was moved to end of life care it broke me but I took the best care of him I could never wanting to be apart from him not knowing he long he had. I feel your pain itās truly heart breaking to be given such devastating news. Just try to take things hour by hour and know that youāre not alone. Sending you strength and love 
xx
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THANK YOU Suzyq75 for replying to meā¦
Iām So So Unbelievabley SORRY that you lost your Husband just 3 weeks ago bless your heart I can only imagine what you must be going through I am absolutely Petrified for what I unfortunately have to come and go through Iām my Husbandās full time carer and Iām physically watching him deteriorating right in front of me, I feel 100% helpless that thereās nothing I can do but carry on caring for and looking after him the best I can
No one in my life understands what Iām going through because their lives are totally fine whereas I feel like Iām driving towards a massive car crash that I canāt do anything about
Thank you so very much again for your message and Iām sending you the biggest HUGāS in the world 
xx
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I lost my partner nearly 7 weeks ago to Glioblastoma grade 4 inoperable. We went on a fantastic holiday just the 2 of us in August. When we got back a week later he went to the docs because he started to get really tired and bit unstable down his left side. We had mri lumber puncture and biopsy of his brain. Unfortunately they found this brain cancer and said it was inoperable !! They gave him 12/18 months. We were absolutely devastated my whole world fell apart. He wanted to be home with me and his grown up stepchildren. I made the living room into our bedroom. He could still talk eat and I used a wheelchair for him. On the Sunday morning he had a massive seizure and I gave him CPR and brought him back. Ambulances came worked on him then went to hospital. I thought that was it I would never talk to him again. Doctors said first 24 hours would be critical. He woke early morning and said āAny chance of a cuppaā I couldnāt believe it. He was put on high steroids and seizure medication. We managed to go home but he was now bedbound, could only use his right hand but eating and drinking fine. He had to have a hospital bed in living room and I never left his side I slept on sofa next to his bed. He then had a dvt in one of his legs so I had to give him an injection in morning and at night. I made sure he took all his medication. It was hard to see him gradually deteriorating. I am so thankful that we got to say everything we needed to. He then woke up one morning and could no longer swallow and was not awake I could no longer communicate with him. He was put on a syringe driver for his medication. His breathing wasnāt very good and he passed the next day on 2nd December 23. I will always be heartbroken without him he was my soul mate but I always think how lucky we was to find each other and all the wonderful memories I have. I try to give myself a job per day to get up and dressed but if I canāt I donāt beat myself up about it I just say tomorrow may be better. Just sending big hugs Iāve been through where you are message anytime x Debbie
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It is so so hard because youāre right, no really understands whatās it like and the pain is for most people unimaginable unless youāve been through it yourself. Iām
So glad I cared for him as much as I could do as he passed away in a hospice but I felt I wanted to do everything I could to let him know I was there and never going to leave him. Iām certain he could hear me even though he wasnāt really responsive it is so hard to watch them deteriorate in front of your eyes I wish no one had to go through it itās truly heart breaking. Thinking of you and just take one day at a time xxxxx
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To Debbie1966,
THANK YOU very very much for sharing all that with me I was crying my eyes out reading your message as my heart was breaking 
for you
I honestly donāt know how Iām going to cope when I lose him it bothers me that much I wish I could change places with him because I donāt want to be left alone in what seems like such a horrible cruel world without him
Thank you again from the bottom of my heart for your message of support and Iām sending you Big HUGāSš« x
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Any time you need support Iām here. I found it helpful to just write my thoughts down each day it seemed to clear my head ready for the next day. You will get through it trust me my heart is broken and I will never be the same again but you learn to carry on.
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Hi Suzyq75
THANK YOU Again for taking the time to message me I appreciate it I really do.!!
My friends all say to me āweāre hear for you, youāre not aloneā and I know they mean well but I canāt help but think No I am completely alone in this Iāve been with my Husband since I was 17 he is my whole WORLD and when he goes so does my world but none of my friends understand this I see them all going out drinking with their partners and husbands and having a great time on holiday etc etc and I feel like Iām on a completely different planet to them because my world has stopped If I was given one wish to come true I wouldnāt wish to win the lottery and have millions of pounds I would wish my Husband to be in good health again thatās all I want in the world
Again Thank You for your message and your support xxxxx
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@Debbie1966
Thank you so much really means a lotā¦
Iām really really struggling to get my head around this
We have no children so when I lose him it will be just me in the house alone with my thoughts and that scares the hell out of me xx
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@Devastated_Wolf you are right. We are living in a strange state. A bubble and canāt do all the things we used to. Everything is out of our control.
I miss going out for meals, watching live music and holidays. I know people say āwell remember the good times.ā And I am grateful that we had those times but I never thought in a million years our lives would end up like this. Stay strong xx
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So sorry Devastated Wolf I went through the same as you 8 weeks ago. The last few weeks of my husbands cancer i cared for him . He was the most positive person i have ever known. He never complained he was so lucky he had no pain. He said a few times wish i could pull the plug. He had lost his.dignity he hated me showering and drying him and helping him on the toilet. In the last few days i had to help him eat and drink. He died in our bed that was his wish. When he started the morphine drip he went to sleep and passed peacefully the next morning. I just wish id had one more day it was over too quickly
We were together over fifty years. I have a supportive family.but i dont want to be here every morning when i waken i am so sad.i didnt pass away in my sleep. Enjoy the time you have left together. My husband enjoyed life till the end he was a remarkable man
Take care of yourself xx
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Iām so so so sorry you lost your Husband
We try to enjoy the time we have left together but itās really reeeally hard when my Husband feels so ill all the time
Thank you for your message itās 100% appreciatedā¦
I just wish i could take your pain from you Iāve really fell out of love with this cruel world, it hurts too much
Sending you Big Big Hugs xx
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*strong text
Good morning, Iām so sorry to read your post. Iv never replied to a post before but felt compelled to.
My Husband Barry had a terminal diagnosis he was given 6-12 months in June 21 just before my daughter got married in August that year. He didnāt tell anyone but my son as he didnāt want to spoil the enjoyment of the wedding he didnāt tell me till afterwards.
He passed away at home I managed to get him home from the hospital for 10 days. He had to have a hospital bed down stairs and I slept on the sofa.
I know how tiring that was so you must be exhausted.
He passed away on the 27th January 22. So itās coming up to two years.
I still feel devastated and if I could have a wish it would be for him to come back home healthy. We were married 39 years just missed out on our ruby.
I wish you strength for the coming weeks/months
If I can give you any advice I would say if possible try to get practical things in hand. Passwords for things are a godsend.
I also have two very good friends who have helped a lot with walks, days out, holidays, nights out etc and just being there for me. Also my family.
I found it helped me to keep busy. I liked to fill my calendar with things to do. And still do.
I try to accept all invitations. And just keep busy.
I try to look at my glass as half full not half empty.
I do miss him terribly. But it does get a bit easier. I sometimes still canāt believe heās gone . X
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I had to send you a quick THANK YOU
You sound like a Lovely Lovely person and I wish you lived near me because I could Reeeeeally do with someone like you in my life unfortunately when my Husband goes I will be completely alone and me alone with my thoughts scares me to death
But Thank You for your Lovely words it is appreciated xx
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My goodness that is so sad for you and your children so young at least my husband was a pensioner
Your husbandās final journey was very similar to my husbandās. Although different to begin with, the brain seizure and what followed are parallel.
Itās been 3 years 3 months since we lost him.
I try every day to āhave good lifeā as he wanted for me and our daughter.
Hi
I feel your pain. My husband had a stroke, and was diagnosed with a brain tumour. I get by with telling myself one day at a time but itās hard and I feel like I am on a tightrope just waiting to fall off. I am quite a private person and donāt like everyone at work to know my life x
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I only joined today. My husband has less than a year. He is my life, we are each other.
I cannot comprehend the future. I honestly feel your pain.
Regards
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