I miss my mum so much and i feel like its getting worse instead of better, i dont know what to do
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So sorry for your loss. I lost my brother 3 years ago then 12 months ago my very best friend my mum. I also can’t move on. I was still grieving for my brother who i was very close to, then mum who was my world passed away. Its tearing me apart. The grief got that bad ive ended up on the sick from work with depression. I won’t go and get help by talking to someone as i won’t know where to start or have the energy to discuss how im breaking inside. Losing your mum is like having your heart ripped out. Pain sometimes is unbearable i either sleep to muxh or cant sleep with all the thought’s of what ifs. Seeing my brother pass and mum i see aa clearly as the day the passed, i cant get the tgoughts out of my head. Did CPR on mum 3 times before she was taken to hospital and went into a coma and died. Ita all still fresh in my mind. I feel.your pain. I hope you find comfort in memories you have of your mum. I have a lot of memories of mum, where ever i went mum was with me, i always took her on holidays 2 to 3 timea a year which she loved and who ever we meet they all loved her. I miss my time’s with her even going shipping she was by my side. Mum lived in a bungalow facing my house whixh also makes it very hard for… im sorry for going on about me but just want you to know that grief doeant have a time on it. Everyone grieve different. Hold onto your memories and think of all the good times you had. Your mum would want you to be happy and remember she is always with you shes always going to be in your heart. Thoughts and prayers are with you.
Sorry about mistakes damn phone spells what it likes. Guess i should’ve checked it before i sent it.
Thank.you everyone for answering me means a lot. Im so sorry for all yorr losses of your mums… i wish i could feel mum around me but i don’t i still feel angry and broken. … i didnt know grief went in stages. God knows what stage im at as been its been a ywar now and im just getting into a deeper depression. Still not back in work. I can’t face the outside world.
Hi Dominika,
I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your mum. I lost my mum too very suddenly on Christmas day and I am also 35. Feels way too young to lose your mum doesn’t it? But it is probably hard to lose them at any age.
Reaching out to people on here has helped me so much to process what’s happened and to know that you are not alone. We are all here experiencing a huge loss in our life and navigate what our future looks like.
I would recommend googling everything about grief, I have learned a lot and it reassures you that you are not going crazy. Everything you are feeling is normal and you will have some terrible moments, but then some days you will be a little stronger. It feels impossible at the time, but the wave does pass. Do you have anyone you can reach out to, family or friends? I would also go and see your doctor, and talk to them about support in your area.
wishing you all the best in your journey and please do reach out if you need to.
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im so so very sorry that you lost your mum too and i would like to thank you for your kind words. Like you said any age its to early to loose mum. i know that it will come time when i will start feeling better but at the moment feels like this will never happen. All of my family still leave in Poland - my 3 brothers and my dad. i do worry about them all the time, especially my dad as mum always did everything for him and now he is 63 and learning how to look after himself. I will never forget that day when i got a phone call in the middle of the night from my brother, i immediately booked flight and travelled to Poland next morning, as soon as i arrived at my dads house i went with my brothers to see priest, pick a coffin, choose dress for my mumand organise funeral. i dont think i had a time to think about what’s happened at the time. 2 day later we had funeral and my dad said " mum loved her children equally, but she loved her daughter the most " and for some reason that made everything harder. i know she loved me and i loved her, she was the most important person in the world for me. im grateful for everything she has done for me when i was growing up, even when she shouted as that just made me a better person. she had very hard life herself growing up and then later years. Last months were awful for her, she was suffering with cancer and radiotherapy made her body so weak, it affected her leg and she was in pain for iver 1 year, the strongest pain killers did not help in last few weeks before she died. so just after she passed away i was keep telling myself that its ok she is not in pain any more, but now 5 months gone and all i want is to see her, even just for couple of minutes. I have been googling about grieving to try to understand it more about it, but its like nothing makes it better. My friend has given me a notebook call " letter to my mum in heaven" she said writing things down help her when she struggle, but i dont even know what to write and at the same time im scared that someone will see it and think im weird of the things i write. i cant visit her grave as much as i would like to as its in Poland, so im trying to come up with something. I see her in flowers, she loved her garden so much, doesnt matter how hard day she had at work or taht she was there for 12h she would do some gardening after work, she always said putting her hands in soil have been relaxing her. Im sorry i have wrote so much, i just feel that i shouldnt be talking to people around me so much about it as its a very sad subject i the last thing i wanna do is upset people around me. I really hope you will find your peace and feel better soon as i know how hard it is. Take care and thank you again so so very much for replaying to my post - i just didnt know what to do
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I’m 18 years in to losing my mum to cancer and I haven’t got over it at all, every January is horrible I don’t no I’m in a mood but I am, always am in Jan, feel Yr pain dom and I guess best way of dealing with it is to talk to others with same problems, I hope u find strength mate and if u do can u show me how to aswell, keep Yr chin up, love tom
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