Since losing my wife 4 years ago after 50 years together I reckon I must have experienced every emotion there is. Recently I had the " bug" thats widely spoken about right now and was very ill for about 3 weeks. I seemed to pick up but for the last week I’ve been feeling so low. I dont do a lot now but was always on the go with something when Val was here but now I feel that I’ve completely lost all my confidence and almost shudder at the thought of tackling anything. This week I’ve been doing a bit of tiling for my daughter, something I’d never bat an eyelid at before but I’ve felt really anxious doing it. Ache from head to toe, feel empty and hungry, light headed and needing to keep stopping the job…need to find something to fill my empty days but just feel so lost and bewildered. Apparently its the “fight or flight” thing but I feel dreadful. Was wondering if anyone else has similar feelings or experiences
I’m sure you are not the only one feeling that way .It’s good that you are helping your daughter .You haven’t been well yourself .Self care (though very difficult) is important .It’s still baby steps no matter how long it’s been .
Please take care 
Hi George. Hazel died on Christmas Eve 2024, or 6 weeks. My concentration has disappeared and i struggle to get motivated at the moment. I do it, but i can’t get enthused. She died in my arms and i get flashbacks of that last 15 minutes with her.
You probably should see your GP for a check up, it sounds like you could be depressed. Good luck and all the best
Hi @george73
You’re definitely not alone. Grief can actually cause very physical symptoms and it can also suppress the immune system which will make you more susceptible to colds and tummy bugs etc.
The way you’re feeling is perfectly natural and we’ve all gone through or are going through the same. Have you opened up to your daughter or a close friend about how you’re feeling? As someone’s already suggested, it might be an idea to see your doctor who may be able to help
Take care
Hi George,
So sorry for your loss, no its not just you, i also had a cold/bug thing in November (the Anniversary 2years ) of my daughters passing, i was dreading christmas, i quit my job recently, i also keep going over certain things in my mind, its tough to focus and get motivated at times. I have good days, Dont beat yourself up, your not alone, you like me have found this site, keep intouch xx
Hi Phil, thanks for caring. We seem very similar as I lost Val the day before Christmas 2020 and now Christmas is a complete no no for me, just cant face it . I really do know how you’ll be feeling and now presumably all the arranging that kept you busy for a few weeks is over and you’re left in this void of what to do now. I’ve been on anti depressants four 4 years now and not sure they’re effective anymore but have a review with GP later this month so will see what can be done. I find this site useful as everyone’s sadly in the same boat and understands what we’re going through. Take care mate