Lost my mum last year and have just completed all the ‘1sts’ hoping I would be able to move on. I want to go out and do things but find I also don’t want to. My husband has said I’ve been distant but I know my mum woukd want me to do things but just can’t bring myself to do so. I love the sun and have found myself looking at the clear blue sky through the window wanting to go out but just can’t bring myself to do so. Just a little lost at the moment
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Hi Blue, my wife found it very difficult to overcome the death of her mother. She tried see some therapist and with a lot of help she came to terms with it in the end. She was very close and she phoned her everyday for a long chat. We would spend most weekends with her helping out so she was a big part of our lives. My wife’s last breath was her her calling her mum in her Basque language. I hope they are together now.
I would get out of the house and get into the sun. We are much closer to our loved ones in nature where we can see the beauty around us. I feel that is the closest we come to feeling the love they had for us and we for them. As you say you know what your mum wants for you so life is short make your mum happy and live and love as much as you can. Make her proud
Wishing you all the best
Tom 
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So sorry @Blue63 that you have lost your mum. It is a hard road we travel. I have found myself lacking in motivation it is a little battle I have with myself. I sometimes give in and sit doing nothing but then sometimes I make myself go out for a walk or do the chores I have been putting off. I love nature and the birds singing. I generally find I feel a little better when I have been out. I hope you find you can get out a little too. Take care 
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