It feels like a dream that he is gone forever

My husband of 15 years suddenly passed after 20 days of hospitalization. I have been in tears since then. My mind is totally locked. Its never easy for me to wake up everyday without him by my side. I have been praying to God and asking myself many questions that go unanswered. Grieve if the most painful experience.

Hello Anne. You’re absolutely right, grieving is the most painful experience. It really is beyond imagination. I lost my husband very suddenly too just over 16 months ago; we’d celebrated our silver wedding anniversary the month before he died. My wonderful husband is at the front of my mind all the time; it’s like I carry him around on my shoulder. I can’t tell you it gets easier because it doesn’t but what I can say is that I no longer cry every day and I can smile and even laugh. I’ve started singing again too which I couldn’t do for a long time, not as much as I used to but it’s a start. I keep busy, very busy. I go out to work which is a great distraction and the only bit of my life which is normal. I write a journal to my husband and I talk to him all the time. I’m sorry to say that life will never be that which we once thought, we won’t grow old together and I will never know pure joy and happiness again. But life goes on. My heart goes out to you and I send you love. Xx

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Hi Anne6565
I am truly sorry for your loss of you husband and this horrendous journey that you are now on it is still so raw for you and you will still be in shock I hope you have people around you for support .
Please keep coming on the site as you are not alone we are all in the same position as you and some one will always answer you sending you a big hug .

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Hi Ann , so sorry for your loss… I as you lost my husband of 18 years after he got meningitis & was in hospital for 3 months… with such an emotional rollercoaster & then dying , it’s the most awful thing that’s ever happened in my life … I understand everything you are feeling … my Tony has been gone for nearly 7 months now & the waves just hit you so hard it doesn’t seem to get easier as people say but I am hoping it will eventually it’s like a living hell xxx

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Totally understand what you are going through. I lost my partner 7 weeks ago and the emotional pain is unbearable. Mornings are the worst time for me, I wake up sad lonely and can’t stop crying

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Mornings are the worst time for me too Michael. My husband used to bring me a cup of tea in bed every morning without fail. How I miss that. How I miss him. Xx

Kate thank you for encouraging and helping me cope with the loose. I understand its never easy. At least I have resumed duty and got many people around me. That smile is not the same though. Thank you.

Thank you Lily. I have read the experiences most of us have undergone. I know I am not alone. Thank you for listening to me.

True mornings are the worst. But even my nights are not good either. I hardly sleep. I just cry.

Hi Bell1963. I am glad you know what am going through. Life had a turn on me. My husband was my best friend and confident. Sometimes I have no one to share with but I am happy to be here. As they say the wearer of the shoe knows where it pinches most. Thank you for listening to me