2025 was a very hard year for me. Grandma died on 24 February, after being ill for a very long time. I saw her getting gradually worse in January of 2025, and I even had thoughts of suicide at one point (although I later overcame them).
But this wasn’t the only death in my family in 2016. My great aunt, or Auntie Stella as I call her, became very ill after Grandma died. She died herself on 17 December; prior to her death she went downhill more rapidly than Grandma did. In fact, on the day she died, I had a meeting with my line manager at work, and told him that Auntie Stella’s condition was terminal. Then, that evening, Mum told me that Auntie Stella had died at 2 am – this means that she was already gone by the time I had that meeting with my line manager. I called another meeting with him the next day to update him.
Auntie Stella had been a very significant person in my life in her own right – many of my core childhood memories involved going to visit her. She was also one of the last surviving members of my family from the Silent Generation – most of my grandparents have now died.
This was the third death in my family in a very short space of time. Auntie Stella’s death came more than a year after Granny died, but less than a year after Grandma died, and Grandma in turn died only a few months after Granny.
But I recently re-watched an interview by Paul Chuckle, who has been in a similar situation to me. He has experienced many bereavements over the course of his lifetime, most notably his brother Barry in 2018. During Barry’s funeral, he was shown with tears in his eyes as he carried Barry’s coffin.
Paul has stated that experiencing a loss can feel physically painful. I can relate.
He has also said that it sometimes helps to have a good cry and let it out.
It’s always interesting to hear Paul Chuckle talk about his grief and the death of his brother and comedy partner, Barry. He is very open and honest, and often shares wisdom about not ‘bottling it up’.