Its day 6 we booked the funeral yesterday. Why does everything seem so wrong. I feel so sad so broken. I cant imagine a life without my Jeff. Married for 51 years how do i go on.
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I ask that question every day, but the days come and go, and we are still here.
I am so sorry for your loss, it all feels so wrong and unreal, it’s hard to imagine a life without them beside us, it’s very raw for you, you will be in a daze, of sadness and disbelief.
I send you my love and heartfelt condolences. Try to look after yourself xx
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Jeff06, I am sorry for your loss, I lost my wife of 52 years in April 2024.
Your loss is so recent you are probably still in shock. Just take baby steps, one day at a time. Try and eat properly, and drink, in other words look after yourself. Be kind to yourself, If you feel really bad try and see your GP they may be able to offer you some help. I hope that you are getting support from family and friends in this difficult time. When I lost my Darling wife I did not know why I was still here, I had looked after her as her carer for 20 odd years. I found this site helpful as everyone here is on the same painful journey. People who have not been through the loss of a long term partner do not understand. We do, so come on here for a chat, rant at the world or a ramble about how things are for you. I did and still do it has helped me. Sending you a big hug like from your brother,
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So sorry for the loss of your Jeff.
It’s so bloody difficult when you lose someone you have loved for a long time. I had been with my Jackie for 60 years and would have been married for 58 in September. She passed just 18 weeks ago
We are both devastated and heartbroken but the important thing for you, me and all here is to look after ourselves. It’s not going to be easy. It’s still raw for you, but you will survive this.
Let your tears flow and take care of yourself.
People here have or are experiencing what you are, so please chat.
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Thanks for your support, i will carry on for our 2 beautiful daughters.
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Hi Jeff06
My hear felt condolences
Day 7 for me so we are running in parallel and I am here alone. Married 34 years partner for 37 and Sally was my total life and I owe her everything. She was my number one supporter , my soul mate my absolute everything and this cross of bereavement and grief is just too heavy, sometimes I cannot breathe. If I can make it to 8.30/9.00 each day I am so exhausted from crying , sobbing and generally surviving. I will take a tab and try to sleep until the morning, so that I can face another crap day of the same crap. I am going to head to work tomorrow for a few hours to just change my surroundings as I have not really moved out of here for 27 days Spending 20 caring for my dying wife with my step daughter who has her own life to live in Suffolk. Oh how I miss her company but she has her life to live, although we call each other each day. She is her mother’s daughter in every way so I am lucky.
I cry so easily , if friends drop in like today I get a lump in my throat and then blub, but I have also decided I don’t care . If I cry I cry
Thankfully this community is amazing and I would be totally lost without them and I honestly feel this community is helping me with dealing with my loss and grief because they share the same pains albeit some are further down the road that me they are still there for me and us. Thank you to this community
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Nedh
I am so sorry for your loss of your dear Sally.My dear wife passed 5 months this coming wednesday.The grief and pain is still so raw,it all happened so suddenly.she had a rare blood condition.Some people may say as time moves on the pain may ease.I am not finding that.I am heartbroken, i loved my wife with all my heart and i will love her for evermore.I went back to work after 4 or 5 weeks.The human contact helped a bit but no one really understands unless they have lost a wife/husband/partner like we have.I find coming back to the empty house so upsetting.We didnt have children and i have very little family only cousins, so its just me.Today was a typical day lately for me.Came home from work and just cried saying to my dear wife i love her so much and i wish she was still here.I feel i cant go on like this day after day.Its not a “life” as such its just an existance.Thank goodness for this site and the kind understanding people who all understand what we are going through.Take care
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We all understand here how difficult it is. Take it a day at a time and dont put pressure on yourself to look too far ahead.
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I am with you brummy we are existing and it is just barely existing. Thank you for your support it is a shame we cannot all meet up some time for a group hug . Thanks again
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Thats ok Ned,We are all here to help and support you and each other.We all understand what we are all going through.I have often thought of your idea.If it wasnt for the support of this site i dont know what i would do.The support around where i am is literally non existant.Take care
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Hello nedh
So very sorry for your loss. Its so hard
Every thing seems pointless, i know that tomorrow will come but i ask why,i want time to go backwards so my jeff is still here. Life goes on but it seems so wrong. Look after yourself and close your eyes and the good memories will come.
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I always feel better when I read the contributions and responses. Thank you all so much
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Hello @Nedh . I have been following your posts and am so sorry. My husband collapsed totally unexpectedly while walking down the road with me and one of our adult sons. Here one minute, gone the next , no warning whatsoever. We were going to a party that night, and off abroad 2 weeks later. I am 6 months in and have gone through so many feelings and experiences. I can’t believe I have made it this far, but I have and I will keep going.It is so early for you and I just wanted to send you a giant hug x
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Thank you Cloudysky and I am so sorry for your loss. How incredibly tragic. It is people like you and this community that help me to keep going but sometimes I really do want to give up. Amazing how quickly life around you moves on and people move on and you find yourself alone , in your own home that used to be filled with chatter , laughs, arguments ( not many) now so quiet which is nice at times but can be soul destroying also. Thank God I have a wonderful neighbour who was Sallys best friend. But I miss that gentle cloak of love and affection that Sally cast over me every day. That is stomach churning, if only I could find a way of getting that back even though Sally is gone. Thank you again for your support
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Its day 11,i just keep crying i miss him so very much. The house is empty, when i come home hes not there,when i wake up he’s not there. How do you all carry on,you must be stronger than me.
Today was a bad day i had to ring British gas again,countless phone calls and e mails and they still haven’t got it right.
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Jeff06, It is so hard when the loss is so new. you have not had time to get some coping methods. I leave the radio on all the time so the house does not feel so empty. Unfortunately there is no cure, it is just that you are stronger than you know. I did not think that I could get through the funeral, but I did and you will as well. Please make sure you are eating and drinking. Be kind to yourself. Just take one step at a time. I have learned to manage the grief a little but I am 15 months into the hard journey. I try and find a happy event the we enjoyed and think of that, Sending you a huge hug like from your brother.
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jeff06
I can really emphasize how you feel.Its 5 months today for me since my dear wife passed.The grief is still as painful.I still cry every day.The empty house is so horrible.Every part of the day is upsetting,the evening and night is so hard for me.British Gas are hopeless.Like yourself countless phone calls.My solicitor trying to deal with them too.Absolutely hopeless.It all adds to our stress and upset.As if we arent going through enough pain and grief.Take care
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Hi, your loss is so new as Rob said, however mine is coming up to 19 weeks this Saturday and I still cry and miss my Jackie so much.
I try to keep busy and also chat here.
It doesn’t get easier, but you do manage to carry the burden of grief in time
You look after yourself, that’s the most important thing at the moment.
Take care
I am six months in too, similar circumstances, got up to go to work, husband aged 58, fit and healthy, asleep forever in the dining room. No goodbyes, just gone, without warning.
My life is in turmoil now, I miss him so, so much.
I also cannot believe that I have made it this far. xx
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Sending sincere condolences on your loss
Kate
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