I haven’t moved furniture or anything else, they are just where they have always been. But, today I have actually been looking at things, and memories came flooding back and tears came flooding out. My mind keeps recalling when and where we chose that item, recalling seeing him with a screwdriver in his hand, up a ladder, digging in the garden.
Watching the television and a place we knew and loved being featured and adverts for shops or products we used.
My Facebook had a quotation that you don’t just lose someone once, you lose them a thousand times.
Have I kept myself so busy that I blocked this huge wave of sadness? Is this a reality check?
It’s the first weekend that no friends or relatives have visited and my life from now on looks so bleak.
I know we have bad days and some not quite so bad. I remember that from the first time I was widowed. But today I feel totally broken and I keep bursting into tears.
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Sending hugs, Willow. Some days are just crap. xx
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Thank you. I needed a hug. Xx
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Today, for me, it has been one where I have been completely numb! In such disbelief and can’t accept the enormity of Andy’s loss. We are all in a situation we didn’t choose, and don’t want!!! Life is so cruel xx💔
You probably have done that ya know - blocked it out by keeping busy. I went through that in the first months - seeing him everywhere … its awful isnt it 
xx
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