Just lost husband

Hi I lost my husband 3 weeks ago he was 39 he died of aggressive cancer that was misdiagnosed in may
I watched him die in the hospice for a month now the funeral is done the ashes scattered his mum and dad are going home
I feel totally lost and alone I have family near and friends but it’s not the same I am on my own a lot I have a friend staying with me but she will have to go soon I feel absolutely empty we were together 16 years and worked together I never drove so he drove everywhere so now lost
The job I do entails driving so that’s difficult I have anxiety so don’t do public transport ie buses
I can’t see any future or light at the moment feel totally empty all my friends have lives partners children I feel a huge void and do t know what to do now it’s empty and there’s nothing to look
Forward to. Help xxxxx


Hi I have also lost my lovely husband to cancer very quick and sudden within eight weeks, immediately after the funeral I was very flat and couldn’t see beyond that day, I sat for hours outside just thinking of how it had all happened and how could it be ? Lots of questions and no answers just heartbreak , so nine weeks on I’m still sitting asking the same questions still heartbroken but my crying has become more silent and my soul more calm and I continue to look into nothing because that is all I have left, I feel my husband is at peace and life is just trickling along which is all I can manage and I live in hope that I will find some meaning for it all sending love and hugs x

I am so sorry for your loss. My husband was 39 too and died 6 weeks ago very suddenly. They still haven’t determined why.

I am 29 weeks pregnant with our first and now only child. I am 38 years old. I am beyond distraught at the thought of living the rest of my life without my beloved. I could live another 40 years so that emptiness you speak of…I feel it too. I don’t want to live. I just want to join my husband. Everyone who tells me to take it one day at a time still has their husband or an intact family. The one lady I believed who told me that my life was going to be hard and lonely …and she was 79 years old with cancer. She anticipates going to see her husband soon.

I am going to be a single parent to a child that will never know her father except through photos and stories. Our protector is gone. The big strong and incredibly wonderful male presence in our lives is gone. I understand your agony. I honestly can’t see things ever being ‘good’ or acceptable ever again. I see a slow death march ahead of me. I am sorry that you are also on this lonely and dark path. No one should be here.


Awe, life is so darn hard isn’t it. My husband of 49 yrs died on the 19th August after just 7 short weeks of diagnosis of aggressive Pancreatic cancer and spread. He was always so fit and young for his age and this came out of the blue. I can’t believe he’s not here and find myself pretending he’s here. I even put a pillow in bed at nights. I loved/still love him with all my heart and the pain is too much. I feel for you and if we are to believe anything then we must believe we will learn to cope. I take each day at a time, don’t think too far ahead as each day is a victory. Take care and keep in touch x


I know how you feel about wishing you weren’t here as I feel that too but your situation seems so hard. Grief is hard and makes us introspective, life only exists in our head and well meaning advice given by those that care about us is given with good intentions. It’s hurts so much and being pregnant I can’t imagine how you must be feeling. Do take each day as it comes and cuddle your expected child bump. The baby is a part of him and his gift to you. I hope and wish you sincere hugs and hope life will get easier as we are led to believe.