Just lost my dad to cancer

Hi I just lost my dad to cancer a week ago . I cared for him with my mum for over 3 years at home . The last 4 months he was in a nursing home as he was too critical for us to manage at home .

My mum is now totally lost and won’t come out of her bedroom , my teenage son and I live with her and it’s really negative and depressing atmosphere as she was married for 58 years .

My mum now has a heart condition and I’m trying to hold down a new job I’ve started only been there 2 months . They have asked me if I need to take time off , but I’m worse if I stay at home and I’ve just kept working , I feel I’m on auto pilot and a huge void when does it ease up any ideas ? I’m emotional support for my mum who refuses to go to Cruse for counselling and my son is now stressed with A levels I just wonder how I’m going to get through this


Hi, I’m not sure I have any advice for you but I just wanted to reply and send you love. I lost my Dad to cancer earlier this year and the grief is so unpredictable. We were told that everyone needs to find their own way through it and I think that is true but it is so hard. Although it is difficult I think maybe focus on dealing with your grief and being there for your mum and son as they need you. Take care of yourself

1 Like

Thanks so much for replying yes it’s hard the grief just hits you all of a sudden like a ton of bricks …out of nowhere it appears . Yes self care is the way forward for me I guess and meditating a lot thanks fir your reply much appreciated

Dee5, I really sorry for your loss. I am a support team for my mum as well, and I have sons, they are teens as well. We don’t live with my mum, but near to her. I am in grief as well, but I have to take care of my mum, who depended on my dad. I am auto pilot as you. I do just the base things we have to do, zero extra. And I am beware of cut the tree under us. Take care, send you hugs.

1 Like

Apu thanks so much for your reply it really helps to know someone else is going through the same as me . I just went away for the weekend to heal and it has really helped . I’m finding yoga and meditating and hypnotherapy is helping me .

1 Like