Last month I lost my mum suddenly to cancer. She was diagnosed and told she could have an operation to remove it. Then a month later told she couldn’t have any treatment (she want the healthiest) because they wouldn’t do any good, then 3 months after that she died! I am at a total loss! I don’t even know how to begin processing it. I’ve had anxiety for at least 10 years and this has really played it up. I’m mainly living in bed. She was my safety net, like the ones tightrope walkers use. You don’t necessarily use it but it’s good to know it’s there if things get worse, and now it’s gone. I’m really not coping 
Hi tallulah 1 so sorry to hear about the loss of your mum, life can be so cruel sometimes I too lost my mum in July this year after being diagnosed in hospital with secondary liver cancer she came home and I looked after her for the 6 weeks she lasted it too for me and my family was far too quick, I miss her so much and I know I will never be the same person again, I’ve started counselling with cruse, have you thought of any counselling either with cruse or maybe sue Ryder they offer it too, you never experience pain like this until you lose a loved one, its such an emotional rollercoaster of emotions, this forum helps to chat with others that know what your going through, I take a day at a time which is still hard some days, I don’t know how people get through it, I just know I’ll never get over losing my mum, take care
Lynn x
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I use Cruise to talk online and I’ve started therapy too, I’ve also applied for the counselling here too. It is hard when you loose your mum and I know she wouldn’t want me behaving the way I am, she’d want me to enjoy life. I need to dobit for my girls too, I don’t like them seeing me thus way. I’m sorry to hear about your mum too.