just over a year since losing my husband

It has now been over a year since I lost Mick my husband of 43 years married. I have no family and am all alone. It has been hard especially through the virus time too. I am so lonely. I have lovely friends but still lonely. I love cooking and baking and cook dinners but when it comes to sitting on my own eating my dinner I really dont want it. I find the evenings the hardist just sitting every night watching tv which isnt me. I am a member of a few womens clubs but because of the virus they have stopped so every night is the same. I just wonder if life will evrer get any better. I miss Mick so very much and really hate this life being alone and lonely.

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Hello, I am so sorry that you lost your husband and are now so lonely.

My mum was married to my dad for 48 years. She would spend the evenings on the computer, whilst he would just be lying in bed, relaxing, as he was ill, yet comfortable. Now that he has gone she sits at the computer on her own, whilst the bed is empty. It is awful, I hate it, I wish she didn’t have to live like this, so I feel so sad that you have to sit alone at home whilst you eat your dinner or watch TV.

Thank you so much for your reply. Its good of you.
So sorry to hear of your mums loneliness . Its so hard.
Take good care and thank you again
Regards Sue

You’re welcome. Please keep posting here if you think it will help with the loneliness, we have quite a few people here who have no one after they lost their spouse, parent or child, they often find that just talking here helps them.

It’s been 14 months for me. We were together 40 years. I too am alone with no family. Since I lost my Che, I have moved and made new friends (female). Both those are positive things that I had to force myself to do.
I’m trying to accept that this is my life now, no matter how much I wish otherwise. I’m grappling with the concept of “never” and it causes such pain. It’s not the acute, searing agony of the beginning. It’s deep inside and it makes me so very sad.
I live in western Canada, and our Covid restrictions are not as severe. My heart goes out to you being locked down… At least I can get out with several friends occasionally. We do outdoor activities. It does fill the time; it does allow me to laugh and it does make me participate in “life”. It’s not the same though, and it’s not enough. I am just learning who I am without him and realizing that the one who knew me completely is gone. I am truly alone now and just take it a day at a time.
On some levels it will never be any better, but I do hope to find some joy in life again, no matter how small…


Hello benenden, I’m new to this group. I lost my husband nearly 2 years ago, I find it really difficult on a daily basis, we had been together 17 years before he was diagnosed with terminal cancer, he passed away 8 months later, in that time we got married and he went 3 months later. It’s a day I will never forget.
I have 3 grown up children and feel lime bit of a burden expecting them to spend time with me as I hate being on my own. Friends always say they will be there but I can go weeks without any contact, I decided to change my career and buy a cafe, some days I wonder if I did the right thing. It’s a strange time and unless you have been through what people on here have been through nobody understands how you feel. I had my husband’s ashes tattooed into me which some people think is weird, but I miss him so much. I know what the lonely feeling feels like xx


Hi Thank you for you message good of you to reply. Regards Sue

S orry to hear your sad news. I think its great you having your tattoo, if thats what you want to do why not! Its funny as I had my cafe /bar too for a few years. Are you in London?
You are lucky having family. I just have friends they are great but I still feel very lonely especially in the evenings. I feel I need a focus and would love another cafe. I was accepted for voluntary work but because of the virus havent been able to start yet and what with having two emergency ops and loads of other problems over the past year it has been hell all due to stress.
Try and stay strong I know its hard. Regards Sue