Just want her back

My sister died in April. She was just 50.Gid I want her back. I’ve just been listening to Russel Watson and his song someone to remember me. I have to it triggers, the crying, the pain and greif is, buried so deep inside so as not to upset folks that I need a trigger. I can’t talk to my husband over any off it not realy, and I don’t want to put it on my parents there upset enough. I started greif councilling this, week. I didn’t realise how much pain I had till the lid started to come of.
Today’s a bad day.

I’m sorry you hads such a difficult day yesterday. I hope today is better for you.
I do realise how very raw and painful it can feel. I lost my Mum suddenly just over a year ago. The “I just want her back” thought comes into my mind often too.
Take care

Dear @Paula51, when you first came to this forum you were asking me about how to get bereavement counselling. Did you manage to get this? If not, do you still want this? If so, Sue Ryder are still offering it and I hear the waiting time is now less.

Hope today is a slightly better day for you, I know your sister’s husband has caused you a lot of unhappiness, this isn’t fair on you, please take care of yourself.

Thankyou both
Yes I’ve accessed bereifment councilling via sue ryder had my assessment on Tuesday and have booked another session.

My bro in law has, caused so much upset. His blasted dating of other woman, joining a dating site. He doesn’t get how upsetting that is.

Also I’m so angry that he never got a second opinion. I asked and asked him to get one. I’d been in touch with christies and a, few other specialist cancer places all agreed to look at her scans and notes if he gave the OK to the consultant. He refused. Why… Why would you refuse. Now in view of him getting shut of her clothes, redecorating the house, getting rid of her dog, buying a new sports car very expensive and a new motorbike, joining a dating site basically liveing large I’m thinking he didn’t want her to live. He’s sitting pretty on the insurance money and pension. I hate him. There I’ve said it. I’ve cut contact with him. I never want to set eyes on him again.

Hi Paula,
You don’t know but I read your post and I just wanted to say that I am disgusted with the way you have been treated. How could your b-in-law be so callous and uncaring. He clearly did not deserve your sister. II echo Abdullah when she says you need to take care of yourself. Don’t let his behaviour make you bitter and twisted, just live your life for your sister. You obviously loved her dearly.

Should have said you don’t know me!

Oh sod him.
My sister asked me to look after her daughter, her daughters in her early 20s to keep an eye on her. I’m doing that. She’s upset too over it.

I wish my sister was here, my hearts, breaks, every day. I plod on I laugh smile get through the day and then bang I’m right back in that moment we found out she’d a brain tumour and the world fell apart. I begged and eaded with a higher power to let her be OK I said if I’ve to live another 30 years take them share them give half to my sister. If only tears bought miricles…

How can her husband say she was his soul mate yet have apparantly moved onto other woman so quickly.God knows. I guess he’s just cracking on with liveing. For me though it stinks.