I havent been to the swimming pool nearby but did go in the pool on holiday but it was too crowded but at least I tried. Now the outdoor one will close as the kids are going back to school. I was trying to pluck up courage to go ten miles away on my own to a two night break with a pool but then I fell over and thought suppose it had happened there which is silly really. Today suddenly my two grandsons arrived with my son and I suddenly thought come on get with it they need feeding. I had cooked burger and chips and veg just getting the ketchup out and it exploded like blood all over the kitchen. So had to clean it all up. Then one of the children fell over and cut his leg so out came the first aid etc. Well I was certainly distracted.
It was nice to see them. They just make themselves at home. The sun has come out and have been weeding the lawn. Stroked the dogs. Gets it off of asking me stuff talking about dogs. But then I got a tel call again from someone who did not know he had died asking about work etc. So that gives me a wobbly but I just told him who to ring instead. Every week I chicken out of going to places I used to go to. I think about what I used to do but that is as far as it gets. My son wanted to move his coats but I didnt want them moved yet. I want to if anyone does when I am ready. I will in stages no doubt. Ihave got to fish out his death certificate yet again which is another milestone to sort out his car.
Hi Enorac, glad you went in the pool even if it was busy. I go a different time to what used to go so i hopefully don’t bump into anyone. Just can’t cope with it. Seems like you have had a busy day, and the sun shining helps. I’m busy rung to understand a toxicology report and post mortem report, it has caused me a lot of upset. My sons inquest has been brought forward. Whenever it is won’t change anything. I find sorting things out you have to do in your own time, like us all little steps, hour by hour. It’s horrible having to sort paper work out for things we wish we didn’t have to do. Take care, big hugs xx
I have found sun glasses, mobile phone, all good things to have when you have to venture out. Saying that I don’t really go far, and only walk with my partner, I have got really good at ignoring people, avoiding people, and have even hidden behind my car in the drive so certain nosey person didn’t see me. Sounds like I’m mad but I just can’t deal with it and niff naff chit chat wanting to know my business. Take care xx
You made me smile. Ducking behind your car. I am getting quite adept at it now. Ducking and diving. I am glad I am not the only one I also have pretend calls on my mobile so if any neighbours lurk giving me that enquirying nosey look - I can swerve them. xx
I remember the paper work in the first year and it was relentlessly upsetting. I took the Tox report to my own GP and she explained it to me. You had a wobbly day. xx
There is an online blog called the Bereavement Journey. I watched it and it explained a lot.
I got a Tel call yesterday in middle of everything from a Cruise Bereavement councillor offering the first appointment.
I had waited a long time and was amazed. She sounded nice.
My mobile and Apple Watch are great…pretend to be talking to someone if I see someone and don’t want to speak xx