l think l need help, but who to go to?

For weeks now lve cried every day. Yesterday hit me like a sledgehammer Again.

lm disabled housebound, lve no-one around me, there’s just me and 4 walls. lve lost interest in everything including food, showering (whats the point lve no-one to wash & dress for). No-one calls or visits. l go to bed early afternoon til following day. My doors are locked and my drapes are permanently drawn.

Yesterday l realised l cant do this anymore, but what to do? l tried the samaritans but the young lady was at a loss, she recommended l ring Cruze but unfortunately l tried them in the beginning and the person l spoke to seemed indifferent to my plight.

People say contact your GP, but that’s a no-go, l dont want someone to ring me l want someone to visit to see the state lm in. They wont even visit to give covid boosters, their response was ‘find someone to take you’.

Is there anyone out there that actually gives a toss about me? lve started crying Again as lm writing this, will the tears and anguish ever stop?

Hello @Lotswife,

I’m so sorry for the loss of your husband. Well done for recognising that you need help - it can be a big step to take. I hope you’re finding the community to be a support to you, but it sounds like what you really want right now is some face-to-face support. I’ve found some options that you might want to explore.

  • Essex Wellbeing Service aim to reduce loneliness and social isolation. There is an assessment you can take on their website. Once you have done that, they will be able to review your health and wellbeing needs and connect you to the appropriate help and support. This could be from one of a wellbeing coaches, a befriending coordinator, a community agent, or through our volunteering programme. You can also call them on 0300 303 9988.

  • You may wish to contact Adult Social Care services to get an assessment of your needs. If you’re already in touch with Adult Social Care services, it sounds like things have become more difficult for you and you may need to be reassessed.

  • Age Space lists local befriending services on their website.

  • The Silver Line offer phone support rather than face-to-face support, but they are there 24/7. You can call them any time, day or night, on 0800 4 70 80 90.

Your GP does have a duty of care to you, so I would really encourage you to contact them, too. If you are finding it difficult to be heard by them, you may want to find out more about advocacy and how they can help you to get the support that you need and deserve.

I really hope these suggestions are helpful to you. Please do keep reaching out - you are not alone.

Take care,

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Hi Seaneen, l thank you for your reply and spent yesterday browsing the suggested links. Unfortunately it seems they do not do face to face, l dont live in their area, they dont work in my area or one although called ‘Essex’ doesnt cover Essex just their part of it. They did say they would ring me straight back with, l presumed contact details for my area, but as expected they didnt ring.

These are the brickwalls l come up against when l do try to reach out, so l wasn’t surprised just disappointed yet again. But thank you anyway!

What can l say? l am a born again christian who had lost her way. But God didn’t give up on me.

Yesterday l was flicking channels and landed on the God channel, noticing that one of my favourite pastors was speaking, l watched. lm so glad l did. Not only was he talking to ME he was describing everything l was going through, which it turns out was of my own doing (l knew l was wallowing in self pity).

Every time l tried to reach out for help this was My decision and so God would block me. It was His way of getting me to move back onto the path He wanted me to take. He wanted me to realise that He was with me all the time and watching me make all the wrong moves, even going so far as to descibe the exact same feelings, anguish - anxiety - grief - pain - loneliness, telling me that what l was experiencing came in Waves and that one would come at me like a Hammer, they very word l used in my opening post. WOW!

He told me that what had passed could not be brought back (hubby?) and at the end of the programme the pastor looked straight into the camera (at me) pointed his finger (at me) and said “Trust in God”.

l felt so bouyed for once in a long while, l had dinner, took myself to bed (my haven), closed my eyes and praised & thanked God for his message.

It was incredible and l just had to share.

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Very late with reply but Thanks be to God.