Life On Your Own

I’m going to cut down on my postings on here I think.

It’s been a year now since I lost mum and life on my own in the same flat I shared with mum. Like other post I read on here the flat does feel empty and big with out her. Like most on here I still miss mum after 54 years together.

You just can’t replace someone like that, so many memories together. Some people have special bonds and have a natural understand of each other. You just can’t have that with anyone.

24 years online seen it all and I think today’s world all it’s ugliness makes you trust no one.

So what’s the answer going forward in today’s world ? My answer would be a time machine because I don’t like today’s world. Given the choice I rather live in the past then today’s world, I think I could be happy there and that’s what counts. Everyone deserves to be happy, do they not ? but I think no one is truly happy on here.

Better times, happier times!

If you have children then you not truly alone! as they will be there for you, but not all of us have the luxury of having children or a close family.

Life is what it is, we have to except it for what it is I’m sure if we had control we would choose a different life for ourselves. But we really don’t have control, we only think we do.

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Hi @Keith68 ,

I’m sure someone will be along to share their thoughts, but I just wanted to say thank you for so bravely sharing this with us. Keep reaching out.

Alex

Hey @Keith68. I’m so sorry you have lost your mum and it sounds like you were both really close - that’s a special bond you can never lose.
I hope you find some peace as you keep moving forward. It is so hard for everyone here but try to hold out some hope that there is some brightness in the world and you can find some comfort in it somehow.
Take care of yourself xx

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sorry for the loss of your mum. i agree with most of what you say. if i had a time machine would defiantly go back in time knowing what i know now. i trust no one especially strangers and people who have jobs where they think they can tell us what we should do when they havent a clue. having kids doesnt mean they are there for you, a lot couldnt care less.
the world isnt a nice place any more and seem to be worse since social media started, people care about no one its seems to be about greed, what they can get out of someone, certainly in the western world anyway.

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It was a year ago but mum with me, do they leave ?

In response, “Happiness” is subjective. I can speak for myself when I say I have not known true joy since losing my beloved Sister, who was my best friend and soul mate throughout our lives. That said, I do find moments of “contentment” and fulfillment, whether it be from my career in the Mental Health field, (helping someone else is the best medicine for depression) or retreating into a book, or a walk in nature. Fleeting yes, but a welcome reprieve from being in perpetual misery 24 hours a day. In the first years of my grief, I isolated myself, turned down invitations, and pushed people away. I know now I was not giving others a chance, and likely hurt their feelings. I would suggest volunteering, developing a hobby, or relocating. Nothing can ever replace the memories we created with our loved ones, nevertheless I occasionally find a smile when I think of all the funny things my sweet Sister said. I never laughed as hard with anyone else since. What I am trying to express is that, like it or not, we have been left here. We can just bide our time until our day comes, or we can try to live in a way that would honour our loved ones. I still have many dark & desperate days, I will not deny. Having children is no guarentee that they will be there for you (many posters on here can attest to that) Sometines we have to “create” a surrogate family, as I have with good friends. From your posts I gather you never lived on your own, thus it will be more of a challenge at this point in your life. I hope you will find your own way of coping and rebuilding in a healthy manner, that will ultimately prove productive for you. Take care, Sister2

What I didn’t put in my post and I don’t always post because it kind of feels or looks like I’m looking for sympathy. But like another person on here but different, I been diagnosed with Myeloma Cancer in June. So got a lot going on in my life at the moment.

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