It’s been 18 months since I lost my husband. The pain is no less, just better hidden.
I have a teenage son to look after so I must carry on and support him in every way.
But what a lonely road! It doesn’t matter how many people are around (I realise I’m very lucky with good friends always checking in on me) I only want to talk to my husband. Just to hold his hand, to hug him.
I don’t know what the point of my life is anymore. Although most times my internal voice tells me off for being so weak and tells me to find some colour in all the grey.
Thank you for reading this, most of you truly understand the abyss we’re looking into.
Hi lonelyplanet, im so sorry for how you’re feeling, i understand, I feel the same way, I only want my husband, ..i have friends and family, but no one can ever replace my precious husband, ill always miss him, my life will always be empty without him..take care of yourself too, God bless you
Hi Lonelyplanet I’m just over nine months and the loneliness of missing my love is so difficult. Finding ways to survive and get through each day is possible but that doesn’t stop it from being an empty life. After having a beautiful relationship this new life feels…
I hope you find joy in your family and in life. Thinking of you and sending hugs
Wishing you all the best Tom
Hi, I really get how you feel. I try not to be too much of a Debbie Downer when I’m with other people but I won’t say I’m fine when I m not. I find it just shuts down the conversation anyway. It’s over a year since my partner died, but I really don’t feel any better. Since his anniversary I’ve regressed a lot and my anxiety is worsening. I really don’t look to the future probably because I just don’t care any more. Take care.
My second year was worse, but not saying yours will be. I had a bad summer and I’m at 2 yrs. 9 mths. It passed a few weeks ago, but I couldn’t understand it. Seems the deepest pain surfaces when we are ready? Or, our psyches can handle it? Hope you start feeling a little better. Struggle, yes.
Thank you for sharing how you are managing your grief and your kind words of support. I’m sorry that you’re also going though this heartache.
Somebody on social media said grief is like a big spray of glitter.
The Spill (The Beginning): When grief first happens, it is everywhere. It clings to your hands, your hair, your clothes, and every corner of your daily life, making it feel overwhelming and inescapable.
The Cleanup (Trying to Move On): You try to sweep it up and restore order. For a while, it looks like you have succeeded and the space is clean.
The Return (Unexpected Triggers): Months or years later, you move a piece of furniture, open an old drawer, hear a song, or catch a familiar scent. A tiny piece of glitter catches the light.
The Shift (From Pain to Warmth): It never truly vanishes. Instead, it settles and becomes quieter. Over time, finding those tiny specks stops feeling like a mess to clean up and instead turns into a soft, warm reminder of love and connection.
Maybe one day I’ll get to “The Shift” part but it seems a long way away.
I wish you all love and am grateful for your kind words.
