Lising my husband

Losing a partner
1

Hi

It’s here again the nighttime the thoughts the everything how does anybody cope with this is wish I knew I have to shut the blinds and curtains and that’s it the loniness starts there is no one here to talk to I have talked to nobody since Saturday and this part kills me I went out for a meal with my brother and his wife and.my nephew and his wife I felt so out of place they where couples and I was not it feels so strange you just look so alone :cry: I know I do not want to.be or even feel like that and never thout I would ever feel.like that I do think they are fed up.of me I do try I talk I smile and I try to be happy but it is so hard to be that.happy all the time that is why I have thought about disappearing :cry: as then they dont have to out up with me I am so confused and lost I just do.not know what to do anymore my nephew said to.me what have you been doing lately going out dancing I said me dancing I have no one to go with and tried to make a joke of it and asked him to.take me where they go.dancing but he laughed and said I dont know where to go I just wish I did I wish I knew what I was supposed to do now I know it was not nice having someone sat next to me someone I could talk to someone to look at the menu with and be able to choose as a couple again oh just to be that couple again that will never be for me it’s over and that’s the hardest part at 68 it’s all over and has been since I was 63 and I never looked at it that way at all

Sarah :broken_heart: :broken_heart: :broken_heart:

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Oh Sarah, there is no answer. I’m sure most of us here feel exactly the same. We miss the same things you miss, cuddles, someone to talk to, meals with our loved one plus so much more. I miss my husband every minute if I don’t keep busy. Please find something to occupy your mind and stop torturing yourself with what can’t be. Do you like to read, knit, watch TV? Please think about trying a bereavement group again.

I’m sure we all understand how sad and lonely you are and I wish I had the answer. We are all trying to find some peace, one step at a time.

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I volunteered at a hospice charity shop. Most charities are crying out for volunteers and more than happy for you to do whatever you can. Many of the other volunteers had physical limitations due to age. There are plenty of roles, sitting on the till, steaming clothes, sorting donations, pricing them, etc. I made new friends, and was invited to meals out, parties and social events. Some volunteered for a few hours a week, or a couple of days, basically whatever suited them.
Just a thought.
Jane xx

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Hi Helen 39

I do.knit and I do nake my own cards but I have no energy or.inclination to do that anymore I have no inclination for anything at the moment this is the most terrible time.for me and I really don’t know how anybody comes with any of it I.am just so.fed.up with this I really do wish they had taken me with paul that night as this is just one big.nightmare I can never wake up from .

Sarah :broken_heart: :broken_heart: :broken_heart: