My younger sister passed away very suddenly in March. Leaving behind 2 adult teenage sons, one of whom has a learning disability.
We had a phone call saying she had been taken to hospital after a sudden cardiac arrest. They kept her alive with machines long enough for us all to get there and then turned her machines off after a few hours.
I watched her die. I replay the day over and over again in my mind and pray for a different outcome. It still doesnt feel real.
I dont tell anyone how im feeling. Everyone thinks im being strong but inside im falling apart.
Hello @RoxyK,
Thank you for so bravely reaching out to the community. I am so sorry for the loss of your sister. It sounds like you are feeling so devastated, which is completely understandable.
You are not alone. We have many members who have experienced the loss of a sibling and will understand some of what you’re going through. You can read conversations our members have shared on our Losing a sibling category page.
You may also find it helpful to read our Losing a sibling page on our website. It talks you through some of what you might be feeling, and how to cope.
I hope you find the community to be a support to you. Take good care 
Alex