I lost my husband 6 months ago and the pain has been relentless. I am lost without him. I am usually in good health but got a chest infection a few days ago. I woke up last night feeling I was choking and realised I am here all on my own. No one to help if I need it. That is truly scary.
I have friends and relatives but they are not here with me in the middle of the night. Frightening
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Hi @mary2 , everything feels far scarier at 3am, doesnt it, The reality is that almost every time, when the dawn breaks we are still here and feeling much better. I remember it well!
But one time, it just might be serious when we might fall over and break a leg, or we get severe chest pains, think we are having a stroke, start coughing up blood, or imaginary bubonic plague. Unlikely, but possible. I used to worry about this a lot, so I bought an alarm with a pendant button, which if activated , automatically calls for help on the phone, the nice people on the phone talk to me on a loudspeaker, then arrange the appropriate emergency service. If they can’t get a response for me, they have the phone number of my neighbours who rush over to check on me. my door keys are in a little safe outside the door, and the response people and neighbours all have the code to open the safe. Its not a perfect solution, but I’ll never be lying incapacitated all night, but it’s a great comfort.
I could get a new wife, housekeeper or au pair, but I love living on my own so that’s not a real option.
It’s been a real comfort.
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You can buy one for around ÂŁ25 That is connected to a family member/s or neighbour or friends by their mobile phones. They get a message if you press the button.
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@LynT, mine is a private one from PPP Taking Care, I’m sure there are other options, including the local authority. Maybe they have different levels of response.
All I’m sure of is that Taking Care have been excellent with me.
So just shop around.
I do know of many people who don’t bother to permanently wear their panic button (pendant or bracelet) but leave it somewhere so they “know where it is”. That makes it a bit of a waste of money.
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Thank you for your reply. I must get one. My husband had one for several years and always wore the pendant when I went out. Funny though I never thought to keep it for myself.
It came from our local authority and worked as you described
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I know how you feel. I felt safe with Tony here and now scared of things happening when im on my own. I wake up suddenly in night and cry out for Tony and realise im on my own. Its not nice. I have a pendant alarm but still get afraid.
Telecare do them
@LynT , they are called caregiver alarms, one is: SINGCALL Tuya Wifi Smart SOS Emergency.
You have to get one with wifi support as some are just in home ones. Amazon has a few.
Me neither Lyn. Everything’s up in the air now. lol
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This is my first Christmas. My daughter lives in Rome, so I will be there for the whole Christmas period. Could not bear to be at home and have to return each evening to an empty house
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Had some kind offers from the family, but its too soon after Carol’s passing.
Not in a Christmasy mood so I’ll pass this year and get through to the new year as best I can.
Carol will be up there watching me incinerate the turkey with her usual shake of the head.
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I don’t have an alarm nut I carry my mobile at all times. I collapsed at night once when my husband was still alive and he did everything for me, so now worry it may happen again whilst on my own.
As for Christmas, I can’t imagine how it will be. It’s only a few weeks since he died.
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Hi Mary2, Bereavement can make you ill. I have been a year now since losing my soul mate. I have been ill a few times over the past year. I am normally very well. It is scary when you know you are alone.I feel i will never be myself again. I hate living without my husband. If it wasnt for my little dog and my granddaughter I dont think i could go on. We are all in thus horrible club. Take care og yourself.xx
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I am with PPP taking care, an d have had to use it a couple of times, very prompt response and very quickly organised 999 connection and ambulance, worth the annual cost. I lost my partner Michael after 55 yrs and jus didn’t know what to do if I was ill, I have had strokes one ischemic and 5 TIAs, so grateful that I am not going to be alone.
Lost my husband on Nov 5 th and I’m in the same boat I worry if I fell or whatever no one would find me fir days but I suppose even with a panic button if I was to drop down unconscious that wdnt wirk either !
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