I lost my husband if 20 years 3 months ago . I am not coping well and feel so alone. I feel I just want to give up . It is not helped by the fact that I live abroad and my family is in the UK . I am retired so do not have work and although I have lots of friends here because my husband was unwell from the end of 2019 we have not socialised for many years . I have reached out to my friends and meet up now and then for coffees and I do speak the language fluently but I miss the shared culture and the conversations in English that I had with my husband . Does anyone have any tips for coping with the loneliness of losing your soul mate and the desolation of feeling so alone ? Does it get better ?
Dear Dragonfly7, I am so sorry for you loss of your husband and feelings of loneliness. I lost my husband seven weeks ago and my coping is so so difficult but I did want to reach out to you. We planned to get a holiday home in Spain for retirement but that dream was snatched away from us by a rapid and cruel disease progression and prognosis. He had previously had a property there so we had a decade of wonderful breaks away and memories to treasure. I am thinking of volunteership locally to try and give me an opportunity to socialise, give me a structure and purpose and to make a contribution to a charity which is close at heart due to his diagnosis. With family in the U.K do you Skype or do FaceTime… social media does make the world feel smaller and more accessible for contact with the special people in our lives. I find this forum very supportive with individuals who have experienced first hand’ these raw and all encompassing feelings of loss and grief, yearning and longing. Sending you strength and comfort.
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Thank you so much for your response. Yes I do FaceTime with the family - maybe not as much as I would want to but it does help the feelings of solitude - I am very close to my daughters but then after the calls I am back in my solitary world - Yes I also need a purpose and volunteering would be good . I am being held back by the problems with forced inheritance and that is not helping me at all - and financially I am feeling vulnerable which added to the grieving process is bringing me down take care on your journey too