Oh Jen you could be me. I feel that I am being puniished for a crime that I didn’t commit. The loneliness is awful and I just want my husband back. I am not a socialiser. Hopefully we will get used to it, take care of yourself xxx
Dear Tansy. I am so sorry to hear about the passing of your husband we miss them so much dont we as you say the lonliness is awful and i wish i could have my Peter back i am not sure we ever get used to it but learn to live with it. Hugs to you . Xxx
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It certainly does cant wait for the sunnier days it does make you feel a bit better I hate the dark nights . xx
@Marl
I’m so sorry for both your loss and the terrible circumstances which kept you apart from him. That must have been so traumatic no wonder you are struggling.
I’m also sorry I haven’t been around much for a few days and have only just seen your messages.
I do hope you will find the support you need on here; there are some truly wonderful people willing to listen who understand what you are going through.
Sending love
Karen xxx
Dear Karen Thankyou I am finding support from the lovely people on here . x
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Hi Jen, Marl, I lost my beautiful wife to Covid almost three years ago on 20 April. All the dates right now are so painful as on this day three years ago we went to A&E to have her checked out after days of feeling ill and they thought it was some respiratory problem but not Covid. Sadly, two days later, she went back to A&E, i wasn’t allowed to go with her and she tested positive for Covid! She never came home though I was allowed to see her once it was known she wouldn’t recover we never got to talk properly… so traumatic as you say. I still feel so totally devastated. It is you all say such a terrible way to lose a spouse. Love and best wishes to you all. Paul
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Hi Paul so sorry for your loss. Covid as devastated so many lives. It will be 3 years on the 10th April since I lost my husband, they say time is a great healer but I am not finding that the case. Today as been a hard day not only Mothers day but also my birthday. It was so lonely waking up alone on my birthday again. Its really hard to celebrate anything , just another day to get through the best I can xx
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Yes Marl, celebrating is a word no longer in the vocabulary… I fully understand how you feel. I’m still finding it hard to believe that the world can never be OK again, no matter how much time passes. Knowing she is simply nowhere to be found on this earth is mind-boggling. 25 years together, not enough! xxx
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Hi Paul H. It will be 3yrs on the 24th April when i lost Peter to Covid he went to hospial on the 23 April very ill by the next day 7.45 April 24th he had died i have still not been able to prosess how quickly he went i said to my son this morning i just couldnt see how bad he was maybe i was too close but he said they could see how bad he was. I miss him everyday and dont like to admit on here im not finding life without him any easier. Hugs to you. Jenny.
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@PaulH
I remember feeling totally baffled about how someone can be so alive one day and simply gone the next. It took me so long to accept that as real and to get over the thought of ‘what’s the point of life on earth?’ I’m better about there being a point now as I have found purpose in looking after what mattered to Richard as well as in helping other people.
Love
Karen xxx
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Dear Marl. I understand how hard today must have been for you being your birthday as well as Mothers day. I am sending you love and hugs. Jenny. X
Thankyou Jenny another day done x
We had 47 years together still not enough time . I miss him every single second and I miss the life we had together. We had both been retired 8 months before he died. They were the best 8 months we were together 24/7 and had so many plans for the rest of our retirement . Now I just spend every day mostly on my own not doing anything life is just so unfair 
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Such a difficult day for you Marl, I do feel for you. We all have a similar timeline and lost our loved ones right at the start of this dreadful pandemic. . I often feel, just how unlucky can you get? Lots of “what if’s”, but simply shattering. As you said, another day done. And as you say Karen, incredible how someone can be alive and well with you watching TV and gone in a month! So sad that we have all had to experience such sorrowful events in our lifetimes…
I also lost my husband to Covid on 10 April 2020. I wasn’t allowed to be with him and I feel so guilty about him being on his own. Was he scared? I can’t help thinking about it all the time. I am jealous of everyone now as they can be together at death, hold their hands, tell them you love them have a proper funeral and a wake for them. I miss my Colin so much. I love him. I think people expect me to move on but I don’t want to. I just want Colin back.
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Aw Chelsea I feel exactly like you. I also feel jealous when I see couples walking together hand in hand. Our lives were not suppose to end like it did him being put into an ambulance and I never ever saw him again after 47 years together. Life is just so unfair. I also cant accept what happened its more like a dream I expect him to walk back through the door anytime. People think 3 years on I should be ok but I am really no further forward as I was when he first died . It was so traumatic not being able to be with my family as we followed all the rules to the letter.
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All truly heartbreaking. All the restrictions back then made the situation so incredibly cruel and more traumatic. And yes, there is only one solution but it is impossible, we can’t have our loved ones back. I yearn to go back in time…
I need to talk about something important with my husband. I just can’t cope with things on my own.
Hi Tansy is there no other family member you can talk to. I know its so hard coping with things on your own I feel exactly the same . Hugs to youxx