Lonely and despairing

Hi all
I lost my husband on March 1st and I am so lonely.
I love him so much snd we did everything together. I have no idea how to cope without him snd I don’t want to . Help me


You will still be in shock so take one day at a time if this is a struggle take one hour at a time.
Cry sob shout whatever it takes to get through, I found writing my thoughts down and I still text him daily it seems to help me.
Everyone on this forum is struggling with the pain of losing a loved one.
My partner left me on 03/02 on a ventilator after we contacted covid.
I have been to hell and back and still sob daily for him but I have listened to advice and am under my GP and receiving counselling with cruse.
I also have started going for a walk early morning hood down when not many people are about. I did stop eating but realised this couldn’t continue so I eat small meals twice a day now.

Your in my thoughts keep posting and reading,



Hello @1954

I’m so sorry to hear about your husband. It sounds as though things are very tough at the moment and you are feeling overwhelmed.

I’m glad that you’ve been able to share how you are feeling here, and I hope that you find the community a good source of support. Everyone here has experienced the loss of a loved one and will understand some of what you are going through.

@Quarterman mentioned counselling and I think that would be a good idea for you. Cruse Bereavement offers a helpline, email support, and counselling and support groups through their local services: 0808 808 1677, helpline@cruse.org.uk, http://www.cruse.org.uk/bereavement-services

Sue Ryder also offers an online bereavement counselling service. This is a free service and sessions are held via video chat so you can attend from home. There’s more information about this service here: www.sueryder.org/counselling

Take care,


Online Community team

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Dear 1954
So sorry for you lost.
I think you are feeling everything is so painful and raw.
I am thinking of you and i am recalling months back when i lost my husband.
It is so painfull to lost part of your soul and body.
Quarterman has said cry, sob. Shout… do whatever you can think to lessen the pain.
Ones i called Samaritans help me to get distracted and for that moment the pain stop, So i would suggest to call someone a friend or call Samaritans talk dont suffer alone, you dont have to be strong .
I am here if you feel like to talk.
You are not alone.


I understand completely. I lost my husband suddenly and with no warning only two weeks ago. I think we can only hope that we can get through these days with help from family, friends and professionals and just take it hour by hour. My friend who suffered the loss of her husband a few years ago described it as a rollercoaster. I never did like rollercoasters and would not choose to be on one - this one we can’t get off. Sending hugs


Sorry to hear of the loss of your husband in March.
So soon to be alone with your feelings. Please keep writing your feeling on this site as it really helps it did me when I lost my husband.
I have been very lonely and still feel lonely alot as I have no family just friends.
Life will never be the same but we must keep going. Try and think positive, its hard I know because sometimes I feel whats the point! The virus seems to be getting better summer is on its way. I live in a flat so I have no garden but try to go out as much as I can. Sometimes I have to make myself go out but I get up every day makeup on earings in ever to to go the bins.
Keep writing on this site it helps really it does.
Take care love sue

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Yes it does help to write down our feelings , I’m so lost , my partner died on the 26th February 2 days before my 60th birthday , I found him he had a heart attack , the shock and the kiss is un bearable

Loss not kiss

Hi Debbie
So sorry to hear how you found your husband. So sad and very upsetting for you and just before your 60th. Like I said before it really helps to keep messaging on this site writing your feelings down does help, it helped me. Just wondered if any of us loners live in London as we could meet up and chat. I have a really good friend who I met on this site she lost her husband too. We both go through down times and good times and we know how each other feels. Be strong Keep safe Sue

Thankyou Yes it does help to write down our feelings and to chat to like minded people who have suffered similar losses and have empathy, I live in Kent but very close to London so very easy for me to commute,

Morning Debbie.
Hope you had a good weekend nd that you are all ok.
Keep putting your feelings down on this site as it really does help you and it lets others who feel low and depressed and in the same boat with their loss the feeling that they are not alone. It was so useful when I lost Mick and still use the site two years later as if I can help anyone I will try. When this horrid COVID is over perhaps we can sort a meet out would love that . I have a good friend Trisha who I met on this site and we are still good friends to this day we text every day and I have seen her in her garden while this situation is around and hopefully we can go out soon for lunch etc. Keep strong and safe and keep in touch

Hi Sue,
Yes hopefully after restrictions are lifted we can meet up and have a good cry and hopefully a few laughs together, I never knew a lot of Tony’s family as we was only together 1 year although with covid it was like 3 years as we spent so much of our time together, and never really got to meet other people we were also child hood sweethearts at 14 , now his family just don’t seem to want to talk about him , I’m not sure if that’s only to me or if it’s a general thing but everyone deals with grief differently I suppose , I just feel like this sadness it’s

Will never end Sorry went before I finished , xx