What is lonelyness. Lonelyness is the physical absence of other people. Its the sense that you are not sharing anything that matter with anyone else. You can be lonely in a crowd. If you live in a city with many people around , you can still be as lonely as someone who lives in an isolated country. Its our culture today no one looks out for you or even notice you, they are all too busy getting on with their lives and fulfilling their ambitions. In the older days life was simple and society more similar in attitudes and welfare this made a more sharing community where everyone knew each other and were the same grade of accomplishments no one was competing against another for more. To have a healthy society free from depression we need some one or a group that is meaningful to us and who really cares about us and that we feel are sharing are joys and are distress.
This forum can help us share are sadness as we all are grieving and feel the same. In the beginning of our civilisation you needed a tribe In order to survive. I have just finished reading a book Earth Abides by George R Stewart about end of the world.


Hello Sugar. Your book sounds interesting. I might look for it on Kindle. I think loneliness and alone are two different things. I can feel very alone and do, but I never really feel lonely. I guess I’m ok with my own company. Perhaps it’s a result of coming from a very large family. (Our son describes my family as having the population of a small village) It’s probably why I’ve enjoyed lockdown. Being at home alone was no hardship for me. The only person I would have liked to share it with isn’t here. However, I get that it’s not the case for everyone. I get that some people hate being alone and I get that loneliness can be debilitating. It’s an interesting topic Sugar and you make some very good points. Thanks for sharing. xx


I came from a small family who did not socialize and who did not have any relations or close friends so having no company around is something I grew up with. I am accustomed to being alone and I am quite an independent person. The hardest thing for me is Lonelyness this is the knowing that you have no one to share your time and future with, someone to plan for, and who is always there when it matters.

I’ve not been alone for 23 years. 30 days on after my wife was stolen from me I am hating it so much. Just typing this fills me with tears. At 49 I should not be going through this. But thanks to our GP she’s gone forever. We were an item that should not have been possible to separate but the GP managed it :broken_heart::broken_heart:

We should not blame anyone on our sad loss as it only makes us feel worse and we have to go on day by day living with our thoughts. I blame myself so often that I could have done something but didn’t. If I took my husband to hospital would he have survived, he may not have, but it does torment me. There must be a reason why life comes and then goes and only God know that.

The doctor’s told her the problems she has was because she was going through the menapause. I since find out they never done proper checks and she thought she was going to have a hysterectomy. 60 hours later she died of womb, lung, bone marrow and lymphatic system cancer and kidney failure. They got it so wrong. I want answers and will try with everything I have. Not interested in there money

It must have been a shock for you and I understand how cross you must be. My husband had heart disease and my GP put him on antidepressant pills which would not have helped his liver or kidneys. He had been on blood pressure tablets a long time but the Autopsy also confirmed he had cancer cells in his blood. He died suddenly after coming home from work and going to bed saying he did not feel well, and that he thinks he got the flu.

It’s not lonliness, it’s having someone to do nothing with

Jay - I feel for you, at least my June was well looked after by the NHS,all of them. When they said all they could do was Pallitive Care I nearly hit them - we all know what that means. She was so strong it took another 4 days before she passed, but she had no pain, that’s what she was scared of

What makes it worse for me is she was a staff nurse for over 23 years. Gave do much to NHS and they let her down big time. Mis diagnosis. Error in medication. Cruel treatment in hospital and no compassion when telling her it’s over. So so upsetting

I’m so sorry for your loss but I to are disappointed with NHS. They told me my wife was negative for the virus but still put it on her death certificate, which meant it was a closed coffin and we couldn’t say a proper goodbye. I think a lot of cases have been mis diagnosed but what can we do. I hope there will be an investigation after all this but I doubt it will happen. We both clapped them the first Thursday. My wife had gone the following Thursday. Never clapped again

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I started to clap because she a staff nurse. Then the GP misdiagnosed and made deadly mistakes and her final week the consultants treated her appallingly. So starting with my doctor’s the murdered my sweetheart at 53. Then people suggest I see the doctor’s about getting help.

I feel your pain. I think a lot of us are going through this. Misdiagnosis all over the place. I understand that they have been overwhelmed with case’s but to diagnose every death as Corvid 19 is a cop out and doesn’t help the families. My wife phoned NHS 111 and was given a prescription for antibiotics. She died 3 days later. They were supposed to help us. Totally let down by the NHS and government. Yes I’m angry but I’m also heartbroken. She won’t be coming home again xx

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Just an addition to my last comment. I have an ear problem at the moment, went to my doctor and was told there is no treatment being given for the near future. I have had to book into a private clinic which are doing treatments. WHY!!! If they can treat me then why can’t the NHS. Its costing me £55 for an appointment which is next week

My. Allison was miss diagnosed in December and probly before that too. How could a diagnosis of going through menapause be cancer of womb, lungs, bone marrow and lymphatic system and kidney failure. Walked in on the tues as needed iv antibiotics. Week later on the Tuesday told what she had. Gone 9pm Thursday. Just so heartbroken

There is going to be a lot of inquests after this. I hope we can get to the truth. But seriously doubt it. I feel like a lot of us that my wife was neglected. She was 63 which is not old. She wasn’t sent to icu because she didn’t fit the criteria. She was dieing. What criteria stopped that. As I said neglected and I will never forgive the NHS for that

In fact I’m going to get private health from now and stuff NHS treatment

Another thought. When you wake in the morning. Is it a relief or disappointment. I know what my thoughts are.

It is hard waking up and seeing no one there. My way to deal with it is sencing that Phil is here watching over me as my guardian angle. Sometimes I talk to his photo on the wall. He always wanted me to be happy, I must try for his sake. I keep myself occupied to take my mind of my thoughts. Watched some good Netflix getting through " money heist " at the moment, and I have read some good books . Only six months ago my life changed completely when Phil died, I dread the next six months, but you have to go on, our time will come soon enough.

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Yeah Netflix is a godsend. Always something to keep your mind busy. I’ve watched Money Heist. Enjoyed it. Good luck for the future x