Two years since I lost my beloved husband. Literally my other half. I still miss him so painfully, those overpowering waves of heartache and tears. Then, in January this year I lost my mum. I was the only child, of an only child, and I never had children of my own.
So I am totally alone, and not coping. I miss him so very much. I miss also not ringing mum two or three times a day about stupid things.
It keeps hitting me, how nobody in the world now cares if I wake up each morning. Nobody cares if I’m hurt or upset. Nobody to tell in the morning that I had a bad dream.
I’m not coping.
Anyone else been through this overpowering devastation and crippling emptiness?
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Yes. I’m exactly the same as I lost my husband nearly 3 years ago and my lovely sister 6 months ago who I spoke to every day for over and hour. We were married for 54 years and I knew him overall for 56 years. he had dementia and it was heart breaking for me and him too. I do have 2 sons and their families but they have their own lives to live and I am so lonely it hurts every minute of the day. i haven’t coped very well at all as family expect me to be bright and cheerful so I try and put on a performance which doesn’t always work. I moved a few miles nearer to them ( their idea not mine) but it hasn’t made any difference in fact it’s made it worse as I have no memory of my husband here at all. so i do understand how solitary you feel and i send you my best wishes . Unless you have been through this heartache nobody would understand. some bereaved people seem to be better and cope better but we lived for each other and didn’t have any friends in the area so it was just “US”
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So sorry about your losses.
In answer to your question, yes, I go through both every day since my wife passed just over 11 weeks ago.
I am absolutely devastated and in a daze. Every day is a cycle of sobbing my heart out, while trying to do jobs around the house.
I really couldn’t care whether I live or not. My family and friends think they help, which they do in a physical sense, however, they have no clue what I and others here, are going through emotionally.
I don’t blame them. The only ones that can help are the ones experiencing this grief, i.e us.
You take care
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@Wifey1 know exactly where you are coming from. its been 3 yrs for me and no one has ever been in touch to see how i am etc. its like i dont exist. i have no one to talk only my self. I have kids but only my son i speak to and there are lots of things you cant talk to your son about.
no one would give a monkeys if i wasnt here, it really came hom when on my 70th birthday this yr NOT one person wished me happy birthday
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I know it’s difficult. Family and friends ‘move on’ and carry on with their own lives.
Unless they have experienced a similar loss, they don’t understand the pain we are going through.
Last night I was reaching the end of my tether with not speaking to anyone. My son is on holiday in Germany with his family so it’s difficult to chat or FaceTime. I don’t want to spoil his holiday with me calling him, so i called my wife’s cousin and had a lovely long call. She lost her husband in 2017 so understands
So really, we need to help ourselves to live with this. If that means going out to meet people or call family and friends, then so be it.
In the meantime. Happy belated 70th birthday.
My birthday was a couple of weeks after my Jackie had passed, but she did get me a card and anniversary card which is in September. 
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I am so sorry for your loss. I understand totally how you feel. I have no family nearby . We didn’t have children and I feel my husbands loss ever more keenly.
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