My mother is 94 and is in a care home. She has the start of dementia sometimes recognizes me sometimes not. She sleeps all the time she’s very fragile and so tiny. I feel I lost her awhile ago and I’m struggling going to visit her as I just get so upset. My anxiety is awful cos of this.
Please try get some help for your anxiety as I think if you don’t go see your mam you may struggle when shes no longer here… I think we all have what ifs and wish we did more even if we did everything. It must be so so hard for you… losing your mam that way… I recently lost my mam nearly 5 months ago she was only 68… I’d give anything to be able to see her… It’s so hard watching your mam deteriorate but try be strong for that time your with her… Have you spoke to your Dr about maybe some help for your anxiety x
Please spend time with Mum,I know it’s difficult,every minute is precious.
I thought in the same way, seeing her turn into a shell of herself and visiting was so stressful and sad.I kept telling myself that she’d already gone.I didn’t realise at the time just how stressful it was because you just keep on going. I didn’t visit every day, but I visited a few times a week, sometimes not for long periods. You’ve got to do what’s ok for you, anxiety is awful (mine has amped up considerably since her death) but now that she’s actually gone, I realised I still had quite a lot of her while she was here and I think now I was just protecting myself by convincing myself otherwise. I got to tell her so much in her final days I’m lucky. Hope you find your way. Sending love and strength your way.