My mum and I we’re best friends she passed Away 7 weeks ago but i feel nothing then i cry then sad all over the place I cared for her alot in her final 3 months of cancer she made me document the nights i was with her so i would have no regrets 57 nights out of 110 as sibling and son did the other nights but for some daft reason it does not feel like i did enough. Only have a few that understand what its like for a Son to loose his mother.
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I’m so sorry for your loss. We are all on this terrible journey, and it doesn’t matter whether you are a daughter or son, it’s hard going on us all. I lost my mum in May aged 90, I had been a carer for 5 years. Miss her incredibly. Big hugs to you. Like you said, you “cared for her a lot”. Just remember that means the world. You were there for her. Don’t ever feel guilty. It’s certainly not your fault. We have to remind ourselves of that (a lot!). There’s a lot of support on here for us all. Knowing we are not alone. xx
Thankyou for your support, I feel like the 5 years of watching mums cancer take her away slowly and the last 3 months of her life is now flooding in, i have time to reflect now after all the admin things, we still are looking after my father who too is very ill for many years shielded the hurt a little, feels like its flooding in now, It feels like i died somewhat that day mum died, part of me died with her, The part i am trying to overcome is not being there with her in her final moment like i promised her, I held her hand right up to about 20min before, i felt everything she was feeling weight on my chest struggling to breath, i couldn’t bare it so i said mum i will be back in a minute she then died short time after i walked out of the room with my dad in the room. I wish i was with her i can only speculate she waited for me to leave the room to spare me more hurt, and if that is the way she wanted it makes me just love her even more
I’ve heard that they often depart when we leave the room. It’s often what happens. They wait for that moment. I am pretty sure they know what is happening. From what I’ve read about grief/afterlife, I get a lot of comfort. I do believe those who have already passed are there to greet your loved ones as they transition on. I’ve read that no-one ever passes “on their own” (even if no one is with them in the room. There will be guides there to transition them on). They will often see signs of departed souls a few days, or even weeks, before they pass. I do find comfort that she would have been at peace at the time. xxx
Mum said that days prior that she was seeing my Aunty and people she knew that had died years ago, it was quite beautiful moment for us both as she was swatting them away and i was saying what you doing mum she said im seeing sister in law and people, i talked to them asked mum what they looked like even though i could not see them but we both were smiling, as mum said im not ready yet go away, beautiful moments memories with my dearest Mum. 
Oh, that’s beautiful. Perhaps what we read about them getting ready to depart and seeing their departed loved ones, must really be true, I guess. xxx
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Not really sure… apparently when we depart we go through a ‘life review’ when we find out what our purpose was here on Earth, and get a look back over our entire life. Maybe your mum’s mum’s soul will have changed and she will be ‘pure love’, who knows… or maybe when your mum’s time comes, she will be greeted by other family. I’m beginning to feel like I’m an expert… and I’m not. lol. xxx
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