Recently I lost a friend to cancer , a friend from university whom I had seen sporadically over the years. The funeral was emotional and brought back lots of memories around losing my dad four years ago to cancer. I’ve never really cried for dad, in fact I blocked it out and just got on with life. The recent death of my friend made me revisit my memories of my dad but now I struggle to think of times we spent together. I never told him what he meant to me and I feel a lot of guilt. How can I move forward from this? Life seems pointless sometimes.
Hi @Chrissy7
It sounds like you have maybe been avoiding your grief and sadness and just kept going since the death of your dad.
But grief is very persistent and seems to have a habit of showing up when we don’t expect.
Have you some photos with your dad which might remind you of past shared times together - or other family members who you can chat to about him.
Perhaps some counselling would help to start the grieving process for you and help you to open up to the emotions which you describe as packing away nice and secure.
You could also write a letter to your dad - getting things down on paper often helps people even though they can’t share it properly with their loved one.
Lots of options for you really but the main one is probably facing the pain and sadness in whatever way you feel is best for you.
Take care xx