Ive recently lost a friend a few weeks ago. We did a lot together before i had a family of my own and then we became kind of distant, having the occasional chat which i feel really guilty about because now she has gone, i keep thinking “why couldn’t i have kept in touch more?” My family were also quite close to her but what is really angering and upsetting me is nobody seems to want to talk about her death or if i get upset, i get told “she wouldn’t want you to be upset.” She probably wouldn’t but that doesnt excuse the fact i am getting upset thinking about her, i just feel so shut down and dismissed and that i shouldn’t feel upset. I miss her so much but i feel shut down by everyone who i try to talk to about her.
I had this from someone people when my mother and brother died. They are not comfortable talking about your friend or you showing emotions so they are shutting you down.
Please don’t let them. If you can’t talk to them, find people who you can. Your pain and feelings are just as valid as theirs and you have every right to express them.
Sending hugs.
I’m really sorry your going through this guilt is normal and wanting to talk about her and what happened is normal to sorry your family are not at the point to want to talk about it and I guess that would really hurt.
Life get in the way unfortunately and I bet she did know you would of been there family commentments are what keeps us busy I best they was the same. Send you hugs and support
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