Losing a parent without seeing them in hospital

Has anyone experienced not being able to visit their patent in hospital before they passed?

Hi Honeybee
My husband died suddenly in hospital 4 weeks ago. No one expected this. We were only able to talk on FaceTime with him which was better than nothing but not great as we were not able to visit & give him comfort in person. My youngest daughter 14 finds this difficult that she wasn’t able to give her dad a cuddle.
Myself and my oldest daughter 22 were allowed in after my husband had his first cardiac arrest where his heart did eventually start beating itself. I am greatfull that I was able to go in and speak to him despite him being unconscious, I know that he would of known I was there. This covid pandemic is awful for us losing our loved ones at this time as it just makes everything so much harder for everyone.
Have you been able to go to the funeral home? Xx

Hi Jools, I am sorry to hear about your sudden loss of your husband. It makes things worse when we are not able to visit in hospital and give our loved onces comfort in their time of need. I totally understand the frustration and hurt you and your daughter have suffered due to the imposed restricted visiting. I was only able to speak to my mum on the ward phone, which wasn’t a conversation with emotions, but of her complaining about not having water, and that I wasn’t able to visit her. I tried to reassure her that a family friend ,who is a nurse in the hospital would visit her, and that the nurse would give her water, she needed to press her bell, then she fell asleep. She did get her water, i learnt later. Her illness all started a week ago with just a urine infection??!! I contacted the doctor who did a phone assessment/urine sample and prescribed antibiotics. I could not visit her, but dad informed me she was eating, and a bit tired. Then suddenly she brought up black vommit. I got the ambulance out, she was in Afib, they gave her heart meds and oxygen, but she passed away, Sepsis was also a reason . I feel robbed of quality time with her , due to not visiting her and dad’s home and not able to visit her in hospital, she was there 1 day and 2 nights, so guess not too long . Ironically, the hospital allowed us to visit mum in a side room after she passed at 6 am in the morning! . They now say had they known she was paliative we could have visited before she died but her deterioration was quick . Will be going to the funeral home soon xx

So sorry for what happened to your mum. We are all going through such an awful time losing our precious loved ones made worse by the covid pandemic and everything else in our lives being turned upside down.
Keep posting on these pages and you will get the support to help you from people who really care and understand xx

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