I am really struggling with the loss of my dad. Its been 8 months and somedays are just as painful as the day I lost him. I have good days, and then bad days i just want to cry and hide myself away. I have so many triggers it can be music, I see a father & daughter, or just random memories. I am also suffering with flashbacks of when I went to see my dad for the last time in the morgue and it breaks my heart. I find it hard to talk to anyone about it as i just cry and it brings everything back. Iāve also had major guilt feelings such as I wish I had told him i loved him more and saw him more etc. Iām only 25 and itās affecting me emotionally, mentally and I feel so depressed. Sometimes I feel that my son is the only thing that keeps me going. This comes in waves, and every wave is different. I just miss him so much and it makes me paranoid that I have to go through grief again at somepoint in my life.
losing a dear old dad who loved and supported you is the most profound and tragic thing in adult life. one day, you are āok.ā I am ten years after dad and miss him in more ways than one. it is so hard ā¦ so you just have to go with the waves of grief. go slowly. grief has its way with us. all we can do is live it.
Hi Sophia, I feel for you. I understand what youāre going through because itās very similar to my experiences. It is a very difficult time, and I, too, have experienced the waves. It can be as simple as song lyrics or remembering something that we used to do together that triggers the waves. I also have feelings of guilt because I hadnāt seen my grandma since the pandemic, and because I only saw my dad twice when I went home (to attend my grandmaās funeral) before he passed away too less than 2 months later. Itās good that weāre able to talk about it though. I think having this as another source of support helps. Are you able to get support from family or friends too?
Iām sorry to hear your going through similar experiences as myself. I have family support and we do talk about my dad a lot. Sometimes I just feel that they dont truly understand what I feel like and when iām upset I often get asked āwhats wrongā. I often fee like saying you should know whats wrong!! Xx
Itās good you have support from your family. Thatās so true (about them not understanding how we feel). Sometimes, I end up saying āIām fineā even though Iām not, just to avoid talking about it. I also feel like thereās really no need for me to explain myself whenever people ask about how I feel. However, it can be tricky because they wouldnāt know that I need support if I donāt say so. Iām still trying to find the balance when it comes to this.