My husband died on 22 May this year, we were married for over 60 years, he was my best friend, my rock, my soulmate, I can’t stop crying, the tears come every day, most of my family live in New York, my daughter lives an hour away and is also struggling. I feel so helpless, sad, angry!
4 Likes
Hello @Havana - I am so sorry that your husband has died - this is very hard. You were together for well over 60 years, so this is a huge shock and you are so early on in grief. Let the tears come, let them flow - it is a release in a way and a sign of your love for him. All your feelings, of helplessness, sadness and anger are all part of grief and what I found helped in earliest days was just to go with it. Grief is in the driving seat of your emotions right now, working its way through you. I found it helpful to think of grief as a process of strengthening us, in a strange way, and it doesn’t feel like for a very long time. Now, 18 months in almost, I have grown accustomed to living with grief alongside me and it is, oddly, ok. Keep posting here, read some of the other posts from others who are walking with you on this road - there is great advice and real solidarity here. Hold tight, hang on - it will get easier, even though it may not feel like that right now x
4 Likes
@Havana I am so sorry that you have lost your husband. 60 years is a life time. You must have so many happy memories. My husband died suddenly at the age of 53 years old. Just celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary. Wish I could of had him for longer to make more memories. I do understand that everyone grief is unique and it doesn’t matter what age you lose someone. I do hope that you have good friends to support you. Take care and big hugs xx
3 Likes
Thank you so much, yes I think I’m
Just going to have to get on with it from day to day! Very difficult, it’s the tears that just keep coming! But I’m sure in time they will get less, but it’s very tough!! It thank you
4 Likes
@Havana I think living day by day is all we can expect; fifteen months ago I lost my wife, just short of our 50th wedding anniversary, a week ago, my sister lost her husband after sixty six years of marriage. It’s true, whatever the circumstances, the grief remains the same. The loss always persists but I find the pain has dulled a little.
It is indeed, very tough and if people ask you how you are, don’t pretend that things are OK, if they aren’t.
If you feel you need help, it’s not a weakness to seek it.
I truly wish you comfort in your grief.
3 Likes
I agree @Havana i dunno where my tears come from either ? They never seem to stop … so painful isnt it ? Xxx