Losing a sister - ICan't cope ♥️

Losing a sibling
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My darling sister Hannah was 33 years old. She was diagnosed in August 2025 stage4 bowel cancer spread , and she died on December 28th, 2025. Everything happened so fast that my heart still hasn’t caught up with reality.

Hannah wanted to be at home, and that’s where she stayed. I cared for her there, surrounded by the things and people she loved most—especially her two beautiful children, aged 11 and 7. She fought so hard, and even in her weakest moments, she was still their mum first. Brave. Loving. Selfless, she was never strong enough for chemo and I just am struggling to understand how she is living her life one min and gone the next :pleading_face:

Watching someone you love fade while trying to stay strong for their children changes you. I did everything I could, but nothing prepares you for the moment they’re gone. Now the house feels quieter, the world feels heavier, and I feel lost, sad, and helpless in a way I’ve never known before.

Her children now live with their dad, and while I’m grateful they are cared for, my heart aches for them—for the loss of their mum, for the future she won’t physically be there for. I don’t know how to help them through a pain I barely know how to survive myself.

I’m struggling to accept that Hannah is really gone. Some days it feels impossible to breathe through the grief. I replay memories, the caregiving, the last days, the promises I wish I could still keep. I miss her voice. I miss who I was before cancer took her so quickly.

I’m sharing this because I need help. I need to know how others cope with this kind of loss—how you accept the unthinkable, how you live with the pain, and how you support grieving children when your own heart is breaking.

If you’ve walked this road, or if you simply have kind words, please know they would mean more than I can say. Hannah deserved so much more time. I’m trying to carry her love forward, even when I feel completely lost.

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Hello @Lozzy1990,

Thank you for so bravely reaching out to the community. I am so sorry for the loss of your sister. It sounds like you are feeling so lost and heartbroken right now, which is completely understandable.

You are not alone. We have many members who have experienced the loss of a sibling and will understand some of what you’re going through. You can read conversations our members have shared on our Losing a sibling category page.

You may also find it helpful to read our Losing a sibling page on our website. It talks you through some of what you might be feeling, and how to cope.

I hope you find the community to be a support to you. Take good care :blue_heart:

Alex

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Hi there. I’m so sorry for your loss, so tragic and unfair. Your Sister was so young and having two young children must make this even harder for you all. I lost my Sister to bowel cancer in December 2024 and still struggle. Firstly with the loss, not seeing her, hugging her, hearing her voice. But also the trauma of watching her suffer so much and seeing her fade away. I don’t think anything prepares you for that. Like you, I was with her at the end of her life, her partner and I cared for her at home. If you ever want to chat feel free to send me a message, even just to vent. Take care of yourself.

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Hi Lozzy

I’m so sorry for losing your beloved sister Hannah and no children should ever have to suffer losing their mother, just can’t understand why life is so unfair and why it has to do this to us.

I also lost my sister to breast cancer in September 2024 after 11 months of her battling it. She had no children but like Hannah, she had too much to live for and life was planning out great for her and she was 3 months away from turning 30.

All we can do is forever be there for each other and continue making our loved ones name, legacy forever alive and always make them proud as they’re always watching us from heaven.

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Thank you so much for your message, it honestly means more than I can say :white_heart:

I’m so, so sorry you lost your sister too. Breast cancer is just cruel, especially after such a long fight. 30 is no age at all… it’s heartbreaking when someone has so much life ahead of them and it’s just taken away. My heart genuinely goes out to you.

You’re right — life can feel so unfair sometimes, and there aren’t really any words that make it make sense. Losing Hannah has changed me in ways I’m still trying to understand. The hardest part is knowing her children have to grow up without their mum, that’s what breaks me over and over.

But I love what you said about keeping their names and legacies alive. That’s exactly it. We carry them with us in everything we do. We speak about them, we share their stories, we live in a way that would make them proud. I truly believe they’re still with us, guiding us in ways we can’t see.

Thank you for sharing something so personal with me. It helps to know we’re not alone in this, even though I wish neither of us had to understand this kind of pain :white_heart: