Losing another family member

Hi all, I’m brand new to this today. The reason I joined is because I feel like when I tell my story nobody understands.

In 2008 I lost my sister (1year older than me) to suicide. 8 months later my father died of a heart attack. He gave up after my sister died and couldn’t even look at me for the 8 months as my sister and I looked so alike. 4 months later my brother moved to Australia (it was his way of coping-he has not returned and I have a nephew whom I never see)2008 was the most devastating year of my life. But fast forward to 2024 and I’m feeling like this year could be worse for me…

My only remaining sibling, my sister (who is 14 years younger) told me 3 months ago that she is moving to Australia in May . She plans to live there long term. I’m happy for her that she is choosing to go her own way but I’m absolutely devastated for me. This feels like 2008 all over again, I feel like I’m loosing my family, she is all I have left as family. I hoped that I’d see her kids grow (I often think of my deceased sister was still alive id have nieces and nephews and it upsets me that I don’t have this)
My sister is my emotional support system because she knows how it feels to lose.

I have serious issues with being on my own, I become so sad and depressed. And I panic. This news of my sister leaving has left me with a feeling of dread. I have no family left, no chance of nieces and nephews close by. The person I hang out with to have a laugh and just be me is gone.

My partner is so supportive but doesn’t understand. When I tell anyone how much I am dreading my sister leaving they say such things as “she’s likely be back” or “sure you can visit”
I understand I can visit but I’m now on my own and it terrifies me!

I’m broken since I got the news. Not sure how I’m going to be able to function in May.

Thanks for allowing me to spill all of this

1 Like

Hello @Missingthem,

I’m part of the Online Community team and I can see that you are new to the community - I’d like to thank you for bravely starting this thread and sharing how you are feeling. I’m so sorry to hear about the loss of your sister and father, and your brother and sister moving away. Most community members have sadly experienced the death of a loved one and so will understand some of what you are going through.

I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I wanted to share a few Sue Ryder resources with you that might be helpful.

I really hope you find the community helpful and a good source of support and I also hope you feel you can access more support should you need it.

Thank you again for sharing – please keep reaching out and know that you are not alone.

Take care,