Hi there, i feel i may just waffle so much but ill try be brief. I lived with my parents who were 64(my mum) and 67 (my dad) My last 3 years has been the diagnoses’ of both my parents with metastatic cancer, prostate and breast respectively. First Dad late 2023 and my mum in early 2024. I did my best adjusting to this, i lived with my parents already at the time so made the assurance I would care for them. Sadly mum passed away of an undiagnosed heart condition, dad managed to wake me from downstairs (he wasnt mobile due to two false knees and hips, he was a firefighter and ex rugby player and unlucky) mum was already unconscious on the ground where i immediately started chest compressions with 999 responder on speaker, this lasted around 13 mins till the ambulance arrived, after 30 mins pronounced dead. My father bless him pressed on with me as his carer and some nurse support (managed to arrange eventually community nursing a month or so before he passed) for another 11 months before sespsis sadly took him. Since then i have managed to process all of their affairs (with one of my own main ones pending) but my main reason for posting is just the utter loneliness afterwards. My brother again bless him has been a pillar of support (and i him) as well as my niece (absolute light in the darkness since she’s been born, soon to be 3) and sister in law. But i thought more of my close friends would check in with me more, im terrible at reaching out. But ive done it with 2 close friends just before this post, my main question is, is this normal? I feel so lost with being made redundant from my job as well. It feels like so much.
im very glad i at least wrote this down.
Gosh, you’ve been through so much. Please tell your friends how you’re feeling, as well. My best friend was a complete pillar of strength for me, but most just don’t know what to say / do. 
it’s really hard to know what to say myself. Honestly, i feel like a bomb has been dropped on my life. I was so lucky to have such loving parents, ones to look up to, they didnt deserve the lot they were given. Dad was a retired veteran firefighter and mum was a nurse for even longer. Being made redundant as well, has made me feel like theres nothing ive got to give as much as I did before sometimes. I really felt with the way i’de carried myself through life and with my nearest and dearest that “if” the worst were to happen they’de rally behind me passively, but i just havent felt it past the initial couple of weeks. I’ve told my nearest and dearest that im feeling lonely and have some stuff in the calendar.
one thing that helps me cry when i need to was an odd show on Netflix called “Midnight Gospel” its hard to explain, but the last episode is both informative and helps break the heart open a bit i need to vent.
Hi, I’m also mid thirties and have just lost my second parent. Although my friends and my partner are absolutely trying their hardest to support me I find that they don’t know what to say or do as none of them have experienced loss. I don’t know anyone else who has lost one parent, let alone both parents. So I completely relate to how lonely you feel. I’m an only child too and I really feel like I’m alone in the world now (even when I have my closest friends sat next to me)