Losing family members and my dog

Coping with bereavement
1

Hi over the last 6 years iv lost serval members of my close family 1st my uncle died who was like a dad to me i then lost my mam18 months later very unexpected as she took bad in the January and ended up in a coma she was so fit and healthy i am completely struggling to carry on without her, then 10 months later i lost another uncle ,then 9 months later I lost my special baby girl brandy (my furbaby)last oct to cancer and that was very unexpected, then 3 weeks after losing my baby girl I lost my auntie who was like a 2nd mam to me .i suffer badly from my mental health and in struggling every day with these loses of my family im so numb and heartbroken and full of anger .i keep thinking why them and not me as i tried to kill myself over the last 10 years 2 x and self harm myself. I feel like I dint deserve to live .i lost my dad 26 years ageo and i didn’t feel like this as i had to push it to one side and concreted on my 2 daughter s

2

Hi @Brandy04,

I’m so sorry for all the loss you’ve had to cope with. That is a lot and it’s understandable if it all feels too much sometimes.

It sounds like you’re looking for support and I’m glad that you’ve been able to share how you’re feeling with us. It is very normal for people who are grieving to feel a bit lost and not know where to start.

We know that a lot of people experience suicidal thoughts when they are grieving, and it is often about wanting the person who has died back or life to go back to how we know it. We have a video about it here which you might find helpful:

https://griefguide.sueryder.org/support/suicide

There is lots of other support out there, and I would really encourage you to reach out and speak to someone about how you are feeling.

  • If these thoughts of suicide become overwhelming, please call 999 or contact your GP for an emergency appointment immediately.

  • You can call 111 and choose the mental health option to speak to a trained mental health professional (England, Scotland and Wales only)

  • Samaritans are available 24/7 to talk about anything that you are worried about in confidence. You can call them on 116 123.

  • Shout are contactable by text, 24/7. You can text REMEDY to 85258 and talk to them about anything.

  • You can also find your local NHS urgent mental health helpline.

  • Sue Ryder offers an online bereavement counselling service. This is a free service and sessions are held via video chat so you can attend from home. There’s more information about this service here: sueryder.org/counselling.

Please do think about speaking to your GP or your mental health team about these feelings of not deserving to live.

You deserve care and support so please get in touch with one of these services.

Take care,
Seaneen

3

Hello @Brandy04 , I am so sorry that you are going through such a difficult time. If you have a smartphone you can download the Hub of Hope app, this may help you get through this difficult time. Sending you hugs :hugs: