Losing mum and dad

I lost my mum 26 January of this year having suffered the cruel disease of Dementia for over 6 years. Then on 21 February I found my dad - he’d suffered fatal heart attack. I feel so alone and lost - I cared for both my parents - just feel empty and at a loose end - anybody who can offer advice ?

Hi Caz
I’m so sorry for your loss. My dad had Alzheimers he passed the end of March this year. He was only 68. I can totally relate to how you are feeling after loosing the special people in your life. It’s been 7 months for me and I still feel the same. Returning to work has helped me as I was on the sick for a long time. It was mainly to get a bit of normality back in my life although I still felt completely empty. I was advised to take one day at a time and make sure you look after yourself. Keeping busy and staying active is also important. In the beginning I would just stay in bed and shut myself away from the world but this is never a good thing. Do you have good friends and support from anyone. This site can be very helpful as we are all here for the same reason and understand eachother. Take care Caz x

My mother died just 2 weeks today, the funeral is over and I feel the sadness after the shock setting in. I am restless and trying to decide what to do next. Its very difficult to do anything, especially when your mind is focused on everything. Mum’s death was unexpected so just before she was talking on the phone about christmas etc. It still seems unbelievable. I’ve been looking at some volunteer dog walking to have some committments and get me out.

Hi Joey
Thank you for your reply. I’m sorry to hear about your dad. My mum had vascular dementia and her decline over the past three years was awful to witness - I don’t know about you but I felt like I lost mum the day she was diagnosed - which just makes things so much more difficult. I don’t work as I had been caring for both my parents for over 6 years and sadly have lost touch with a lot of friends due to other commitments. I have kept busy as I was nominated executor to deal with the estate - but that is now coming to an end. This whole experience seems to of blown my family apart - I have four other siblings! I have my own daughters but don’t like to burden them as they are trying to deal with their own grief. I’m grateful that I have found this site and am hoping to share experiences and feelings with other people in similar situations.
take care also x

Hi I’m sorry to hear about your mum. I guess with myself as mum spent the last five weeks of her life in hospital not making any progress or getting better - deep down I knew where we were heading - which didn’t make anything any easier. Grief has so many emotions - shock, anger, regret and so on. I had two dogs of my own and also inherited the dog I bought for mum, so I walk for at least an hour daily, which makes me go out, so it does help. I still feel sadness and its been almost nine months since I lost my mum and eight since I lost my dad. People say it gets easier with time.

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